Dear Second Chance

If you are in doubt or just need someone to talk to please reach out… 
to Philip Seymour Hoffman what a talent and this disease is cunning, baffling and powerful

Dear Second Chance, 
My relationship is really negative and bringing me down.  What do I do?  I find myself drinking more, and I think I might have a problem.  Can you help me?
Sarah V.  
Sarah, I'm sorry to hear about your relationship problems. But there is hope!!! Relationships are not easy.  They require work and with that comes joy and heartache. Drinking will not cure any of your problems. In fact the alcohol will magnify your feelings and then dull them all together. If you are drinking that much, remember that alcohol is a depressant and the following day you may wake up with guilt and resentment towards yourself. That is normal because alcohol isn't your friend it fools you into thinking it is your friend especially when it is used as a crutch. Booze takes feelings away for a brief time, but eventually it catches up to you. The good news is that you recognize that you might have a problem. If you are certain that you want to quit than I would look up an AA meeting and check it out...If you are still questioning if you in fact have a problem, really take notice of how it affects you.  Do you have the ability to stop on your own? The answer will come...you know yourself and I promise things will change if you want them to. 

Dear Second Chance, 
My sibling is getting out of rehab, what can I expect?
Joe P. 
Joe, your sibling getting out of rehab is a good thing, but it is also going to be a big change. Your sibling has been in a very controlled environment. He was told when to get up, eat, clean, go to a meeting and go to bed. When he gets out his safety net will be gone and all of the triggers of the past and reasons he used drugs or alcohol will still be there. Hence you will need to do everything in your power to help him. I recommend going to an Al-Anon meeting. Al-Anon meetings like AA are all over the place. Some meetings may feel right to you and some may not.  Keep trying till you find a meeting that fits you and your comfort zone. I also highly recommend you getting a sponsor in Al-Anon and working the program. This disease affects everyone and everyone needs a little TLC. You will find someone that you can relate to and share your experience with.  The sponsor should be someone that will not judge you, but someone that will listen and give you advice on how to make the transition in your life. Getting sober is easy and hard all at the same time. People need to immerse themselves in a new life. They need to get rid of all of the old coping skills and replace them with new healthy skills. This will take time...it is said that it takes 90 days to change any habit so give it 90 days at least and see what happens. Good luck 
Dear Second Chance, 
I’ve been in recovery for five years and I feel like I am still alone and life hasn’t gotten any better, what can I do?
Jennifer T. 
Jennifer, you need to spice things up and get back into the program full force... meaning go to 90 meetings in 90 days and if you don’t like the meetings that you have been going to then go to different meetings. I promise that if you go to meetings and talk to your sponsor daily things will change. Get involved. Service is always the key to happiness.  You obviously had some serenity and peace given you have 5 years, but everything gets stale after sometime and you need to get back to the basics and things will change. I have felt the way you described, and I got involved and I also started getting on my knees and thanking God and turning things over and it worked...try it and let me know how things work out. 

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