R.E.S.P.E.C.T.

This column may not be popular with everyone, but I write what’s on my heart.

At this time, I feel this must be said. We teach this concept to our two little boys, but I think some adults have missed this lesson.

As Thumper quotes in the classic Disney film “Bambi,” – “If you can’t say somethin’ nice, don’t say nothin’ at all.”

Everyone knows the saying, so why is it so hard to follow? With on-line media such as Patch and other websites like Facebook, MySpace, Twitter and blogs, people seem to think it’s OK to log in under false names and attack others.  

In my opinion, things are starting to get a little out of hand. We have become a self-centered, self-righteous society.

It’s one thing if there’s a true debate going on about a hot topic like government or education, but it’s a totally different story when it’s a personal attack toward an individual. More often than not, these comments are hateful and divisive.

Frankly, it’s getting a little old.

It doesn’t matter who it is. It’s just not nice - plain and simple. It’s breaking down our society and making people bitter, unconstructive, negative, and hopeless.

What’s the point? Do we want to bring others down with our words?

I'm so thankful that my kids aren't of the age to be online reading what's being said. It says nothing for our human nature or our sensitivity to others.

At times, I read comments on Facebook and other online social networking sites and get a kick out of the ongoing debates. However, I also realize that I'm becoming numb to the truth of the matter. 

Where is the RESPECT, people? No matter who is being berated or what the heated topic is, these are REAL people with REAL feelings. I often wonder if anyone stops to consider the impact of their words before they click 'send.' I'd be devastated if I was at the receiving end of some of the comments I've seen lately.

What has happened to us as a society? How can we so freely attack and criticize without any sense of responsibility? Where has the kindness gone … the sensitivity to others? 

There are ways to communicate a point without making it malicious and destructive. I’m fearful for what our future holds if people think this sort of behavior is acceptable.

Perhaps the online outlet offers an easy solution to feeling better about oneself by attacking others. I often wonder if those who use such direct and cutting comments would be capable of speaking those words in person. Lately, I think some would.

I had a situation happen last week. I was delivering Avon, as I always do on a Thursday morning. At a certain intersection, I was having a difficult time seeing due to an obstruction at the corner where I was waiting to pull out. I started to drive slowly as a car came flying through the intersection. The woman beeped the horn and gave me ‘the bird.’ The look on her face was of pure hatred and anger. I wanted to cry!

Despite trying to be careful in a tough spot, that was the response I received. That person doesn’t know me. Yet they had no hesitation in doling out that extremely offensive gesture. I couldn’t IMAGINE doing that to someone else. She might as well have punched me in the face. It felt the same.

It physically pains me to see people attacking others for no good reason. Where does all this bitterness stem from? I can’t fathom having the nerve to act that way toward another human being. I was raised to treat others as I would want to be treated.

Liberty Mutual had a series of television commercials that ran for a while. When thinking of this column, it was the first thing to come to mind. The message sent was one of positivity and of helping others by “paying it forward.”

If everyone could say just one nice thing about another person each day, if everyone just held a door for another person, let a car merge in front of them on the highway, allowed a mother with a child to go ahead of them in the grocery line… imagine how much better our world could be.

Imagine the example we can set for our children.

I admit I'm not always perfect when it comes to consideration of others. There are times when I'm in a rush and get frustrated if someone is going slow in front of me, or if someone has 23 items in the 15-item express line at the Weis.

But that's when I have to step back and ask myself what's really important in life. Being a good person. Being kind to others. Doing what's right.

Here's a very basic list of ways to be KIND to one another. Let's make it a challenge for this week.  Let's be as self-LESS as we can be.

I'll join you in the challenge. I know it's going to take some effort, but I think it will be eye-opening too.

Ways To Be Kind:

• Say one nice thing to three people you encounter – every day for a week.
• Hold the door for others – always.
• Smile and say ‘Hello!’ to anyone you pass (rather than looking down at the ground).
• If someone is in need of help, for example, an elderly person with his or her groceries, or a mother trying to push a stroller through a doorway - HELP THEM!
• Drive with consideration – if someone is trying to merge onto the highway, let them in.
• Pay the toll for the person behind you, or offer a few bucks toward the bill of the person behind you at the drive-thru.
• Send a card to someone you haven't talked to in a while. Tell them you're thinking of them.
• Drop off a meal or special treat for someone who's going through a tough time. It will mean the world to them.

Try to do these simple things, and let us know how you feel about yourself by the end of the week. You can bet your bottom dollar you'll feel pretty darn good.