My Mommy Mentoring Experience

I love the month of May. It’s my favorite for several reasons including my daughter’s birthday on May 18, mine on May 14 and one of the best days of the year – Mother’s Day. It is a big deal to me because it seems like I waited my whole life for my real life as a mom to finally start.

I think most people would agree today’s children are our future. One way to invest in our kids is to invest in ourselves as parents. Since parenting doesn’t come with an instruction manual, a required training period or even prior experience with children (scary!), when I was pregnant with our first child I began my hunt for a mentor – a Mommy Mentor (my parents passed away before I had children of my own). Many professions outside the home have mentors so why should a profession as important as motherhood be left out in the cold? I took my cue from none other than Jackie Kennedy. She said, “If you bungle raising your children, I don't think whatever else you do matters very much.”

Thought to self: if Jackie Kennedy said not to screw this up, I’d better invest some time in figuring out a game plan. So that’s what I did.

I began reading parenting books even before I was married (yes, I admit, a little unusual ... who really does that)? Honestly, I wasn’t an obsessed mama-wanna-be on the prowl, I simply found the topic of child-rearing fascinating. I view motherhood as one of the most important and highly respected professions on the planet and I wanted to be as prepared as possible.

How could I find the perfect mentor for me? I looked for the fruit of a mother’s labor. Whose children did I enjoy being around? Which kids were polite, pleasant and respectful?

Fortunately, I found not one, but two remarkable women who were willing to share with me their perspective on the art of parenting.

My friend Marcy is a mom to 8 children. Yes, 8! She knows a thing or two that I can benefit from, for sure. I was eager to learn her secrets, her wisdom, any trick up her sleeve that I could pull out of mine when the time warranted it. Turns out she didn’t really have tricks or secrets – it was mostly old-fashioned common sense coupled with insight and experience. We met several times over the course of my first pregnancy and I scribbled notes which I still have tucked away. I also took mental notes, I observed her actions and children’s behavior any time I was with them.

My other friend Sharon is like a second mother to me. She reminds me so much of my real mom. Both women are caring, nurturing, warm, kind and have ‘mother’ written all over them in the best sense possible. She was a confident through difficult pregnancies and a true friend.

On the first Mother’s Day when I was a mom myself, I wanted to thank these two incredible women for their prayers, insight and caring. I gave them each a vase of flowers and Mother’s Day card; it meant so much to me and I was so excited to be a mother like them. To this day, I still send them a Mother’s Day card as a way for me to honor and continuously thank them for their wise and motherly influence on me. Happy Mother’s Day to Marcy, Sharon and every mother and mother-to-be.