Overnights: Parent vs. Significant Other or Step-parent??

Often, clients ask about overnight arrangements for their children.  I recently had a matter where the unmarried parties had two children, ages 4 and 5.  Mom had left the house that Dad had owned; she moved in with a significant other for almost a year.  Dad had the children sleep at his home 5 nights per week as Mom worked third shift at a health facility.

Because the parties were never married, I filed a Miscellaneous Petition in the Rhode Island Family Court for the father, seeking to resolve issues about custody, parenting time and custody.  Mom was unrepresented.  Mom came to court with two demands.  She wanted the children to sleep at her house even though she worked from 11:00 p.m. to 7:00 a.m.; she would leave the children with her significant other.  She did not want to pay any child support.

The Mom argued that she had a right to leave the children with whomever she wanted on her nights even if she would be working out of the house from 11:00 to 7:00 a.m..  Dad always allowed the children to sleep at Mom’s house on the two nights per week that she did not work, but he wanted the children to sleep at his house, with a parent instead of with a significant other.

As long as a parent is a fit and proper person to have custody (or joint custody) of a child, the court will favor a parent over a significant other on overnights.  Leaving a child with a fit significant other for short periods (an hour or two) may be acceptable, but when a parent is available, he or she will be the preferred person rather than a non-parent. 

Parental rights are always considered and are paramount to those of significant others or step-parents.  Children who are 4 or 5 years old are entitled to have a parent care for them if they waken in the middle of the night for any reason.  If a child is sick and awakens, a parent can take actions for the benefit of the child that a significant other cannot. 

The Judge was also not going to accept the Mom’s desire that there be no child support order; federal and state laws and regulations mandate child support, even in this case where the Mom picked the kids up from school and the Dad picked them up from the Mom after his work.  The Dad was providing more care of the children, getting them to school and caring for them in the late afternoon and evening.  Because Mom was caring for the children each afternoon for several hours, the Judge suggested less than the full guideline amount.  

Law Office of Steven J. Hirsch   352-1000