There was a time when ignoring a knock at the door and perhaps hiding in a windowless room would’ve been considered rude or even shocking.
“Sunday afternoon calling” was a traditional social custom in the 18th, 19th and early 20th centuries, when families would visit friends, neighbors or acquaintances in their homes after church and the midday meal.
These unannounced visits were routine — and even expected to the extent that the impromptu hosts always had a dessert of some sort on hand to serve the guests. At the very least, they entertained the caller at least briefly before making their apologies for having to rush the visit.
What they lacked in sincerity, they made up for with manners. Today, people don’t feel as tied to social customs.
The shift didn’t happen at once.
The telephone made it easier to stay in touch. Cellphones made it even more convenient, providing an option for people to text their arrival. Families became busier. Strangers at the door — solicitors, politicians, scammers — made the knock at the door seem less neighborly and more intrusive.
From an etiquette standpoint, is it OK to hide and ignore the doorbell? Should you even have to hide? Do safety, privacy and personal comfort in your own home take precedence over social graces? If it’s a close neighbor at the door, is it still OK to ignore it? Does it matter if it’s just kids who want to play with your kids?
We’re asking for Block Talk, Patch’s exclusive neighborhood etiquette column. Just fill out the survey below. As always, we don’t collect email addresses.
Block Talk is a regular Patch feature offering real-world advice from readers on how to resolve everyday neighborhood problems. If you have a neighborhood etiquette question or problem you'd like for us to consider, email beth.dalbey@patch.com with Block Talk as the subject line.
Sign up for free local newsletters and alerts for the
Across America Patch
Patch.com is the nationwide leader in hyperlocal news.
Visit Patch.com to find your town today.