Fail for the Right Reasons

If you are going to fail at something, it’s better to fail for the right reasons. Just as we all make mistakes, so we all have failures. The person who claims never to have had a failure has either not taken real risks, or is in denial.

I’ve had my share of failures. And they have been of different sorts and for different reasons. What I learn from them will determine whether they end up being for my good, for the development of wisdom and character. Just as a setback is a place to grow, so a failure is an opportunity to learn.

Golf can teach us about failures and what to do with them – and how not to be afraid of them, but to learn to anticipate, accept and even laugh at them. A golfing buddy taught me that there two kinds of failures or mistakes in golf: mistakes in judgment and execution. So if I read a putt right but fail to stroke the putter correctly, it is a failure in execution. But if I misread a putt and stroke it perfectly, it will still not go in the hole, due to my failure in judgment. One can of course make both mistakes simultaneously, misjudge and mishit!

My friend maintained it was preferable to misjudge than mishit, for with the latter you can at least feel good that your golf swing is working.

Better therefore to fail due to mistakes in judgment than execution. Then your mistake has more to do with your understanding than with your performance. Perhaps you gave it your best, and actually did what you did well, but it was not the thing that you needed to do, not what would have worked in that situation. Remember that the only true mistake is the one from which you learn nothing.

Some other right reasons for failure:

Better to fail due to integrity than its absence. If you have to be a “whistle-blower” then be one, even if it may cost you your job. I have known persons who failed in some business venture because they refused to cut corners, refused to cheat their customers with inferior material or workmanship. Though they failed, they could take some pride in their integrity.

Better to fail due to taking risks than holding back in fear. Great successes are almost invariably preceded by great failures; without the willingness to experience the latter, great achievements rarely happen.

Better to fail because your dream was too big than not big enough. Let your reach exceed your grasp.

Better to fail because you cared too much than too little. At least then you will know you tried everything, you gave it your best.

Better to fail because you tried too hard than not hard enough. At least then you will not be haunted by what you should have done but didn’t.

Better to fail because something was out of your hands rather than in your hands. And so much in life is really out of your hands. Do what you can do as well as you can do it, and leave the rest to heaven.