The Life of a Stay-At-Home Mom

I have always wanted to be a stay-at-home mother. Perhaps it's because that's all I knew. My mother was a stay-at-home mom and my closest friends growing up also had mothers who were homemakers. Looking back, I realize I was fortunate to have my mom always there—she was there through my formative years and was even there to get me off the school bus and chauffeur me to Brownies, ballet and ice skating lessons after school.

I have the best childhood memories of my mom. She came up with the best birthday parties and made hand-made award-winning Halloween costumes, and she always volunteered to be room mother.

My husband and I met 17 years ago, and I remember that one of our first in-depth conversations was about our families. We talked about where we grew up, the role of religion in our family and what our parents did for a living. Although I grew up in New Jersey and my husband in New Hampshire, we shared a lot of similarities in our family life. We both grew up in a suburban town just outside a major city. We both were raised in homes where religion played a major role in the family. We both had fathers who liked to garden and mothers who stayed at home. We both knew then that we wanted to give our children the same upbringing.

We discussed my staying home with the kiddos all those years ago, but reality didn't really set in until our son was born nearly two and a half years ago that I, too, am a stay-at-home mom.

I know I am blessed to stay at home with my son, a job that is so rewarding yet stressful. Knowing I am this little person's main disciplinarian, teacher and caregiver is so demanding on my time, patience and sanity.  But it's a lifestyle I wouldn't trade for the world.

The ability to stay home to raise our son does come at a cost. We must survive on my husband's income, keep to our agreed budget and cut corners whenever and wherever possible. Most importantly, we live within our means and don't carry debt.

I never want to deprive my son of a birthday or Christmas present or an extra-circular activity. However, I will not go into debt to provide it.

I was a successful business woman with a blackberry and a rolodex before I had my son. I am not ashamed to admit that I miss a bit of that lifestyle. My family and friends can attest that I have never been one to sit idle and I must always be busy. That is probably the biggest reason for wanting to work. That and wanting to maintain my contacts for when indeed I do go back to the working world after we raise the last of the kiddos. I have been very fortunate to have found paying jobs that have not taken time away from my son. Writing, event planning/marketing and pet sitting have helped keep me grounded. I have maintained my mommy sanity and individual self-worth, all while helping to contribute to the family and allowing us to indulge in the little extras.

The best thing of all is I am still able to be that traditional stay-at-home mom and wife who chauffeurs my son to playdates and gymnastics, remains the homemaker and makes sure dinner is on the table (well, at least four nights out of the week!).