Cheese Penis, Mama! When Privates Aren’t All That Private

Not surprisingly, parents love to tell me funny stories about their kids and their privates. Boys, in particular have some pretty stellar things to say! Here are a few of my favorites about some boys age 2 to 5. 

“One time my son and I were on our way back to Bremerton from Seattle and we were on the ferry. Fortunately we were in the car. My son announced that he was hungry, so I unwrapped a piece of string cheese for him and passed to back to him.

He grabbed it and then proceeded to wave it around and yell at the top of his lungs “Cheese penis, mama! Cheese penis!” He did this over and over and over.

I was crying because I was laughing so hard and trying desperately to hide it. I didn’t want this to become a regular thing and if he saw me laughing, I knew I was doomed. You’ll be happy to know, it didn’t.” -- Shawn T.

“My parents came for the holidays and my mom reminded me of the day my son and I were sitting on the couch, looking at a book and he looked at me and said, out of nowhere, “I love my penis!” -- Anna B.

“My mother in law was over visiting and my son had just gotten up from a nap. He was wearing nothing but a tee shirt and sitting on a big arm chair, all by himself.

Suddenly, he leaned back, spread his legs, whapped himself in the crotch and said at the top of his lungs “BALLS! Baaaaaalls…Baaaaaaaaaaalls!”  I was speechless.

My wonderful mother in law looked at me; looked at my son and said “Time for some underpants!” Indeed. --Terri F.

Let’s hear it! What has your child said about their privates that cracked you up or mortified you?