As with all explorations of design-based systems in science -- both in the so-called hard sciences, like brain science, and the allegedly soft sciences, like anthropology or sociology -- there is generally a one-in-five exception rate at any moment of interaction between parent and child.
Gender specialist and psychologist Joann Deak calls the exceptions the 20 percenters.
Some of these may be bridge brains, and some exceptions may be behavioral in-the-moment; in other words, they reveal themselves in given situations. Thus, at various times and in different homes, a mother's responses may be more paternal and a father's more maternal. Even so, major differences between moms and dads show up as general patterns throughout the world.
How Mothers Nurture
Let's look through the lens of maternal nurturance to see the gifts moms often bring to their sons. Mothers tend to
- bond with boys in a greater variety of modalities than fathers and for longer spans of time per day (especially with younger boys)
- provide hands-on attachment whenever possible, including longer spans of physical touching, such as hugging and taking care of nicks and scratches
- emphasize multitasking in a boy's development as opposed to focusing on one or more "very important jobs"
- help boys express their emotions in a higher quantity of words than dads tend to use
- search for methods by which to practice and teach direct empathy
- relinquish personal independence and self-care more frequently than dads in order to meet the needs they perceive a boy has on a daily basis
- promote a boy's character and self-esteem development through greater reliance on verbal conversation and feedback than a father might
- help a son feel better more quickly and feel more emotions constantly
So there is such a thing as maternal nurturance. We've felt it, intuited it, and lived it.
The above is excerpted from Raising Boys By Design: What the Bible and Brain Science Reveal About What Our Sons Need To Thrive by Gregory L. Jantz, PhD, and Michael Gurian.