For the Love of Neca; the Anguish of Losing a Pet

THE LAST COUPLE of weeks have been filled with many happy and sad moments.  My friend and neighbor found out that her beloved 15-year-old cat, Neca, was terminally ill.  She was sad, afraid and anguished.  I know that a lot of time was spent discussing treatment options, medications and ultimately her end of life care.  It was decided that it would be best for everyone if Neca could spend her last days in the safe, familiar and loving environment that she has lived in all her life.  She would be able to sleep and rest in her favorite spot in her favorite bed.  The key was to keep her as comfortable as possible…for as long as possible.

My neighbor asked if I would help with in home care - hospice if you like.  I was honored and humbled to be a part of such a close and intimate relationship between human and animal.  Our days were spent watching and analyzing Neca’s activity level, appetite, facial expressions and any other signs or nuances that she might be giving us.  Neca was such a trooper about injections, pills and IV’s and barely grumbled at all.  I don’t know that I’d have been such a good patient.  We had to laugh about the fact that she would only eat organic chicken livers – the most difficult thing to find at the store late at night – and sometimes in the light of day!

The days that followed were filled with fear, but also a great deal of sweetness, closeness and meaning.  We would wait for the sun to come out and swaddle the little furry girl in a nice, soft blanket and tenderly place her in a warm sunbeam.  She really loved this and we loved watching her.  There was so much contentment in those moments and even though no one spoke, we all savored and cherished these times.  Neca thanked us with her eyes, soft face pats and butterfly kisses. 

Every couple of days Neca would rally, and then wane.  I hoped and prayed that she would somehow give her owner a sign when it was ‘time’.  There is such a fine line between ending a life prematurely and letting things go too far.  If you’re a pet owner, you no doubt, know the anguish of these decisions.  Ultimately, the ‘time’ arrived and it was time to say that final good-bye. 

I’m feeling a little lost today as I write this.  I grew to look forward to our visits and felt that I benefited from them as much as anyone.  I miss the comraderie and togetherness.  I know my neighbor is grieving and will for a long time to come.  She misses her little cat and I know how empty her house must seem.  I also know that she made the right decision at just the right time.  Her saddest day was also her kindest day.

Here’s to remembering and enjoying all those wonderful and happy memories.  And here’s wishing you peace, love and heart hugs to any of you who may be remembering your own special furry one(s) on this day. 

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"A cat's whiskers are so sensitive, they can find their way through the narrowest crack in a broken heart."  ~Author Unknown

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Marilyn Hendrickson is a transplant from Montana who has lived in the Kirkland area since 1985. She volunteers weekly at the shelter in Houghton and enjoys cooking, reading, wine-tasting and spending time with friends and family.