South OC Watersheds: 2 Lumps Of Coal For 25 Years Of Nothing by OCPW

When it comes to OC Public Works (Watersheds Division), trustingly charged with the protection, preservation, and maintenance of native habitats/open space, any and all watershed restoration opportunities have been wasted, year after year after year here in SOC.

In ceremony, during this, our Jubilee Festival, we pay homage and render unto our Caesar (County government) that which is and has been theirs for 25 years: A virtual lump of coal.

“If you cannot—in the long run—tell everyone what you have been doing, your doing has been worthless.” Dr. Erwin Schrödinger

If you, like my NGO, Clean Water Now, had been closely tracking this slow-moving train wreck, it’s basically akin to watching all that’s worthwhile in rural SOC go into disrepair that was avoidable.

My experience is that OC Parks personnel have their heart in the more appropriate place regarding Mother Nature but can’t implement much without the miserly OC Board of Supervisors support and funding. Hence Lump of Coal #2 and the fickle Finger of Fate to our ever so jolly Grinches at OCPW.

I know where OCPW’s head is at, where it’s been for 25 years, and it seems in a dark, barely reachable or comprehensible place.

HISTORY

Back in 1998, 2 watershed study stakeholder working groups were formed: One was dedicated to the already-under-great-stress Aliso Creek Watershed (ACW), those meetings held from ≈9 to 11:30 am, followed in the afternoon by the lesser-stressed San Juan Creek Watershed (SJCW) group (≈1 to 3:30). These convened 10 months/year for many years.

I know, myself and 2 of my founding board members attended religiously. EVERY agency imaginable was engaged, sent reps: The SD Regional Water Board, the US Army Corps of Engineers (USACE), (then) Cal Fish & Game, US Fish & Wildlife Service, USEPA, Municipal Water District of OC (MWDOC).

SOC NPDES Stormwater (MS4) permittees, both County and municipal, water and wastewater utility members in attendance too, it promised hope, identified problem areas and restoration projects for problematic sections and tributary sub-sheds demanding immediate focus. Tutorials and slide show presentations abundant, the meetings were my crucible, my primers as a new activist.

The proverbial “all hands on deck,” answering to the call of our watershed’s obvious physical, chemical and biological degradation as emphasized in the just then released seminal USACE Reconnaissance Study for Aliso and San Juan Creek Watersheds (1997).

In 2000, it was approximated that restoration of the highly urbanized, densely developed ACW (≈36 sq. miles) would run about $1 million/sq. mile=$36 million. The SJCW was about ½ as urbanized, so less per mile. At ≈174 sq. miles (then the estimate by the USACE), the restoration sticker price was around $100 million.

Today’s admitted estimates: About 4-5 times those amounts due to more backsliding, entropic degradation, labor and enviro-document progression costs, etc. And 25 years later? Not one major Capital Improvement Project (CIP) with OCPW as lead/funding agency, not one EIR certified and implemented.

Meeting frequency began to swiftly taper off when it became rapidly apparent that the County had no intention of actually doing anything beyond spit-balling and pointing the finger of blame for the entropy in both watersheds towards other agencies: Like it wasn’t THEIR fault, either to fund or to fix. They even called restorations linked to MS4 Permit compliance "unfunded mandates."

OCPW seemed to be unacquainted with administering and accomplishing any CIPs or flaccid preventative maintenance and are still strangers to degradation reversal strategies to this day.

In 2005 the SJCW group suddenly adjourned for good, disappeared like the morning fog on a hot sunny day, never to be resuscitated. The ACW group was gutted, shrunk tremendously in both public attendees/agency representation plus frequency, meetings became quarterly, and then disappeared completely several years later.

In a sense, SOC’s watershed ecologies have been held hostage, in the iron grip of those committed to nothing of any significance occurring on their watch. This watch, from 1998---2022 (25 years) has been my watch too, as the leader of a vigilant, modestly sized, grass roots enviro-NGO.

No discernible product, just an endless daisy chain of contrived meetings featuring false claims of progress. A parade of back-patting politicians and career County employees that paint a rosy picture, optics that intentionally deceive the public into thinking something’s been accomplished.

Go to the watershed website and it looks gloriously inspirational: “OCW protects public health and safety, promotes environmental quality……facilitates collaborative large-scale integrated water resource projects and planning.”

Lies, all lies. https://ocerws.ocpublicworks.com

They must be in paradise up there in Santa Ana, I mean where else could you be employed for 25 years and be rewarded like Homer Simpson at Mr. Burn's nuclear power plant for doing nothing?

Oh they’ve piled up data and metadata, point that activity out as if the storage/collation of data constitutes fulfillment.

Maybe David Byrne of Talking Heads saw Earthly OC Watershed stewards final abode like this: “Heaven is a place where nothing ever happens. It’s hard to imagine that nothing at all could be so exciting, could be so much fun.”

CWN’s seen several “changing of the guard” fiascos, upper echelon watershed managers come and gone (I think we’re on our 6th?) during that period. And each time the County brings a newbie aboard, they reshuffle the deck, reorganize and act as if Voila, brag that it’s a new dawn, new day, but the “song remains the same”: Restructuring, new categories and titles for management, i.e., rearranging the deck chairs on the Titanic that is our SOC Watershed conundrum.

Like that French trope, “The more things change, the more they are the same,” what’s emerged is a perfectly dreamy vision for the County. No money spent and not one SOC restoration project has ever been directly funded.

So where are the OC Board of Supervisors spending the hefty taxes they acquire from the SOC base? Beats me, do you know?

Imaginary interview of lower and mid-level staff prospects by upper echelon at OCPW:

“So, are you hoping on your watch to help reverse the ecological nightmares that the formerly pristine SOC watersheds have become? You are? Do you have a special warm place in your heart for plants and critters? You do? Next!”

“So are you willing to commit yourself to unravel the Gordian Knot of SOC watershed restoration, solve the riddle and come to your cramped cubicle fired up for change? You are? Do you have a special warm place in your heart for plants and critters? You do? Next!”

“So are you willing to just do what I tell you to do, that is nothing, give the public the illusion that there’s hope, push paper and maybe a broom in my luxurious private office? You are? Congrats, You’re Hired and at slave wages! I have my weekly tennis lesson with Fabio at 11, quiche and Perrier at some tony place for lunch, then my weekly pedicure and manicure appointment at 3, followed by my weekly sojourn to my hair stylist. Stuff. Try not to do anything I wouldn't do, which is nothing, k?”

Closest thing to a CIP was actually reactive, an ongoing problem but ignored emergency: The "had no choice" strengthening of the lower reach of San Juan Creek by OC Flood.

An emergency that gave them no options, so they rehabbed a flood channel section just below the City of San Juan Capistrano due to erosion effects and their solution was to increase watercourse capacity during peak rainy events.

Took them years to pull the trigger on that one, but it was cheaper than being sued by homeowners along the Creek. OCPW "manages" alright: Manages to accomplish little and hopefully nothing, especially if pricey.

If you’re in County leadership, it’s been a way of life for 25 years. Help is not some distant ship to the rescue upon the horizon. It’s not being planned for because they consider the spoils of watershed wars to be nothing changing, on par with and defining success, everybody gets their salary and even in some upper echelon cases, performance bonuses.

If you, as a private commerce owner, ran a business that way, you quickly have none, file BK: But this is public sector government, remember?

“The person who risks nothing, does nothing, has nothing, is nothing, and becomes nothing.” Leo F. Buscaglia

No need to give Santa any instructions on these coal lump deliveries. He called and said that he'll drop them into that big bin out back. Apparently, OCPW has a sizable inventory and has been naughty a lot.