Autism-The Elementary School Experience

This blog is the eighth in a series about a Lake Elsinore mom's personal challenges and triumphs  ...

Finally!! I felt we were getting somewhere. The district and county agreed to move the eight students to a program on a school site in our district. I was so happy that my son would be able to go to school with his siblings, neighbors and peers. Well, almost...

It wasn't his neighborhood school, but close enough. I learned it is best to compromise sometimes in order to win. I felt this was a big victory. My son finally would be only eight miles from home, instead of 45. That in itself was quite an accomplishment. His sometimes two-hour bus ride was now 15 minutes. Things were definitely looking up.

I immediately got involved at the school site by TRYING to join the PTA.  At first, I wasn't accepted to serve on the board, so I volunteered as much as possible (representing Special Education) at the site. 

The gals serving on the board at the time were a little leery of this "new" parent whose child attended the "county" special education class.  I think they were a bit apprehensive because my son was the only "autistic" student on campus and no one really understood his behavior.

I became the room mom for his class and befriended the principal. He became my biggest supporter. He was a great guy and welcomed us with open arms. He made sure his campus welcomed our "county" run class too. This opened the door for my involvement in the PTA.  

I also made sure my son was mainstreamed into the Kindergarten class part of the day. He also had recess with the "standard issues" Kinders. The first few years of elementary school weren't real easy for our new class,  even with the principal's support, but I was determined they would be better.

The school was under its second phase of construction. Our classroom was a trailer down below the main campus. I really didn't like that location and as I watched the construction, I mentally imagined our classroom being moved up with the other kids. 

In the middle of all of this, our dear principal was moved and at first the new principal wasn't as accommodating to our special ed students. We bucked heads constantly, as I tried to make sure our kids were included in all things on the site. As she got to know me and I her, things changed thank goodness.

Once the construction was finished, I spoke with her about moving the children up on the main campus. It happened!! What a difference that made. I had also started attending school board meetings and getting to know our school board members.

The Director of Special Education and I became friends (we still are to this day!). We worked together to start a "SEPAC" (Special Education Parent Advisory Committee). This was in 1993. 

I became the president of the SEPAC and continued to serve on this committee for another 12 years.

Between my affiliations with the PTA and SEPAC, I organized an "Awareness Fair" at my son's elementary school. It consisted of the "standard issue" students spending a week going through the fair. They learned first hand what it was like to have a disability. The fair was a huge success and we branched out to other schools in the district. 

I also presented the fair to other districts. The children really changed in accepting the "special needs" students on the campus. It was a wonderful experience for all involved. 

My son came into elementary school with behaviors, was non-verbal and had a lot of sensory issues. I quickly learned to advocate for services. My first meeting with the IEP (Individual Education Plan) team, when he started with the school district and county was very overwhelming. Not for me but for the district and county. I brought 12 people with me to that meeting. I had done my homework as a parent and advocate. I never attended any IEP meetings alone. As a matter of fact, I started serving food at my son's IEP meetings and the other team members loved it. It also helped when meetings ran long and people would get hungry. This little extra step not only kept everyone fed and "happy," but as the word got around about the food, more people WANTED to attend. It became my signature move.

Even with all I knew, my son still didn't get what children with Autism get now. Unfortunately, we didn't know as much about early intervention and ABA services. A few years after he started in the district, the early intervention 40-hour-a-week programs became the service all the parents wanted.

I helped a lot of parents of the younger kids get those services, but unfortunately the consensus at the time was, if the child was older (like 7 years or so) they were "TOO OLD" for the program.  Boy, we really didn't know much back then. 

Needless to say, my son fell into that category and never got the services. When Brandon turned  9 years old, he was still basically non-verbal.  We were told by the "EXPERTS" that if he hadn't regained his language before 5 years old, he would never talk again. I didn't listen to those experts of course. I went to an Autism conference and saw a presentation on PECS (Picture Exchange Communication System) program. I knew Brandon was a visual learner and could relate to pictures, so I thought this might be something that would work. The district had sent some speech pathologists to the trainings for PECS. Out of all of this came my family's "Angel" Ms. Becky....She is  the most positive person I have ever met.

My son and "Ms. Becky" became friends from the first day. Becky had been attending PECS seminars and was certified to use this method. She initially worked for the district, but later became a contracted person exclusively doing PECS. 

I requested that she work with Brandon and she did, for the next 13 school years (and beyond).  The bond Brandon and Ms. Becky formed was amazing. He totally trusted her. He surpassed the PECS program itself, but because Becky was so creative, she kept finding ways to help Brandon communicate through pictures. She came to his classroom two times a week for years. She collaborated with his teachers and in turn helped them to help the other students who were non-verbal. 

My son found his voice again...not only through the pictures, but was able to verbally make sentences and ask for his wants. Amazing!!

Brandon had three teachers in the eight years that he was at the elementary school. (I kept him there as long as I could, because  I knew middle school would be a whole new ball game!) The teachers were learning more about Autism when we were ready to leave elementary school. There really wasn't much training going on at the time he started in Kindergarten.

We had a few mishaps during those early elementary years. I remember someone duct taping his shoes to his feet, because he kept taking them off. Little did that person realize that he had sand in his shoes and it was bothering him. He couldn't tell them and they just thought it was a "bad behavior." My poor son came home with his feet so raw. He has had a problem with wearing closed shoes ever since. Something like that was why I got so involved.

 I made sure our district and county knew of any trainings in Autism.  I became good friends with the teachers and the aides and still have some of those friendships today. I was a big advocate for these county teachers and their aides, because they were great people.  I also knew how hard their job was.  

When it came time to transition to middle school, it was so hard to say good bye to the people who had really made such a difference in my son's life. This was one of the hardest transitions, not only for my son, but for me....It was like leaving your loved ones and moving away.

Next: The Middle School Years & Puberty Arrives!