Is there a gap between you and your partner? What does it take to bridge that gap? It really depends on the amount of damage and resentment that’s occurred. But in order to be able to begin the process it’s important to at least give each other the benefit of the doubt.
It’s not to minimize your pain around what has transpired up to this point but it’s to notice it but not let it overwhelm and block the process. It’s not only the one person actively putting their feelings aside, it’s also the other noticing and validating the pain. It’s a cautious and compassionate dance where each continues to regulate their their emotional experience while soothing the other.
If you each give each other the benefit of the doubt to start, there is a better chance of transitioning out of your adversarial position into a more open and even collaborative one. Relationship reconnection and healing requires more than the benefit of the doubt but it is a critical starting point.
Find a way to get there and you’ve stepped onto the path.
If you need some help getting back on track, see MarinTherapyAndCounseling.com to learn how Lisa can help.
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