MomsTalk: Toddlers and Tiaras Controversy

Q:  Did you see the Toddlers and Tiaras controversy where a 3-year-old girl was dressed up as the Julia Roberts  streetwalker character in the movie Pretty Woman?  What on earth are these moms thinking parading their youngsters around like this?  Why would anyone watch this show?  What is your take on this?

A:   Yes I saw that video too!  Before I let my opinion rip, I feel it is only fair to disclose two things...

Firstly, I have a TiVo season pass for Toddlers and Tiaras, I never miss it. Along with my new favorite Dance Moms, they are my now-not-so-secret guilty pleasure.  Like watching a train wreck, I just can’t look away.

Secondly, I myself am a crazy gymnastics mom. I wear a horribly gaudy rhinestone-studded t-shirt, obnoxiously emblazoned with my daughter’s name, to all her gymnastics meets. You can spot me a mile away, big hair and all, cheering for her like a total lunatic. My husband swears I could best any Toddler and Tiaras mom when I am in “the zone”!

Having said that … of course these parents, mostly moms, are certifiably crazy! I mean really, who thinks it’s acceptable to dresses their 3-year old up like a prostitute for God’s sake? I’ve watched the show since it started and let me say, I think most of the parents who are profiled have clearly lost touch with common sense and reality. 

I am not saying these folks don’t love their kids. I am saying they have a pretty skewed perception of what is appropriate for a little girl. The lengths some of these parents go to in order to transform their little girls into miniature beauty queens is astounding. This is beyond playing “dress up”, its fake tans, fake nails, fake hair, fake teeth and the like.  What messages are these little girls receiving other than they are not “good enough” as they naturally are?

I do think there are some benefits that girls can reap from participating in certain types of beauty pageants, but these “Glitz” pageants featured on the show are getting ridiculous. I think a mistake was by broadcasting this particular episode.  In my opinion, the character portrayed and the costume 3-year-old Paisley Dickey was wearing crossed the line of decency. 

I agree with Melissa Henson, director of communications and public education for the Parents Television Council who told The Hollywood Reporter, "We have a serious problem when The Learning Channel features a toddler, who probably hasn't even learned to read, dressed as a prostitute showing off her sexy strut." 

Wendy Dickey defended herself in an interview with the NY Daily News, saying, "No harm was done to my child. I'm raising my child just as well as any mother does ... I take my kid to church every week."  Might I suggest that Mrs. Dickey skip church and instead take her kid to Target and get some appropriate clothes on that child!

I don’t know why other people watch the show, but I can tell you why I do. It’s not a nice answer, especially given the aforementioned criticism, but it’s an honest one. When I watch shows like this, I think to myself ‘hey, at least I am not screwing my kids up as much as those crazy moms are’ and I feel relieved. Sure, I make plenty of parenting mistakes, as we all do and I put a dollar in the “future therapy jar” every day just in case.  I may be a crazy gymnastics mom, but in comparison, I think I’m doing a pretty good job!

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it!