Arts & Entertainment
American Airlines to Squeeze Seats Even Closer Together
A satirical look at current events!
American Airlines to Squeeze Seats Even Closer Together: Just a day after airline executives went before lawmakers to defend their customer service, American Airlines confirmed it is once again shrinking the distance between seats in the economy section on new planes.
One thing’s for sure, this has to be a dream come true for everyone who’s always felt that there’s just “too damn much room between the seats whenever I fly coach.” Its beginning to sound like these airlines won’t be happy until they remove all the seats. I mean, at this point, why not just drop all pretenses and simply chain the passengers to the wall? Hell, it’d probably be a lot more comfortable than trying to squeeze into one of those seats in coach.
When confronted about the issue, an American spokesperson told reporters to “just think of this as our contribution to the battle against obesity.” American is claiming they are operating on a very thin profit margin, which I take to mean there’s not a whole lot of money to be made flying fat people around. On the other hand, I’m sure lots of passengers are thinking “fat chance I’ll ever fly American again.”
