Blind Tadpoles Able to See After Eyeballs Are Attached to Their Butts

Blind Tadpoles Able to See After Eyeballs Are Attached to Their Butts: In what is considered a stunning new development, researchers at Tufts University were able to give sight to blind tadpoles by grafting eyes onto their rear ends. Well, they do say “hindsight is 20/20.” On the other hand, we have a chief executive who talks out of his arse. My concern is that these poor tadpoles won’t know whether they’re coming or going

Trump Breaks with Tradition by Refusing to Have a Pet: Donald Trump could become the first U.S. president in decades who doesn't have a pet in the White House. He doesn’t have a pet? Then what the hell’s that thing on top of his head? Besides, that squad of flying monkeys ought to count for something.

http://www.johnnyrobish.com

Texas Man Jailed for Overdue Library Book: A Texas man found himself arrested and jailed after a recently passed local ordinance took effect which allows courts to issue arrest warrants for library patrons who have books checked out which are over 90 days past due. Wow, they really threw the book at him! Lets hope after he serves his time he’ll be able to turn the page and move on to the next chapter in his life.

Scientists Find Unexpected Entanglement Origins in Photons: Researchers have found that particles, once thought to have to originate from the same place, can actually come from different locations in the phenomena of “entanglement” - whereby particles can be separated by billions of light-years and be instantly affected by the quantum changes in one another. Fine, but frankly at the moment - I’m more concerned about the “entanglement” of my frigg'n earphones than any proton particles.

UK Nursery Discovers Rare Carnivorous Plant Ate Bird: A gardener at a popular UK nursery in Somerset thought he was working at a Little Shop of Horrors after discovering that one of his carnivorous pitcher plants had eaten a small bird. All I can say is, its probably not a good idea to feed this plant Miracle-Gro.

Carl's Jr. to Say Goodbye to Sexy Burger Ads: Carl’s Jr. has decided to ax its racy, frat-boy hamburger commercials featuring barely dressed models and celebrities like Kim Kardashian, Paris Hilton and Charlotte McKinney - to put the focus more on food quality. What scantily clad girls? I just assumed people went to Carl’s Jr for the informative articles. Makes sense though, because when people head over to Carl’s Jr, they’re thinking “food quality.”

Trump Shocked Women Know Who Susan B. Anthony Was: President Trump spoke before a room full of women at a women’s empowerment event for Women’s History Month and name-dropped some prominent historical women before asking the crowd if they knew who Susan B. Anthony was - then expressed shock that they did. What’s he talking about? I mean, everyone knows she’s married to Frederick Douglass. Or was that Casey Anthony…?

People in US Chewing Much Less Gum These Days: Chewing gum seems to be losing its appeal as U.S. gum sales have tumbled 11 percent over the past four years, with many these days associating gum chewing as a nasty habit. No kidding - I’m thinking about taking up smoking to help me quit chewing gum. Besides, if gum prices continue to rise at the current rate, we may need to consider an “Affordable Gum Act.”

Alaska Airlines to Dissolve Virgin America by 2019: Alaska Airlines announced that it will fully absorb the California-based carrier Virgin America into its Alaska Airlines brand and Virgin America will exist no more by 2019. Probably a smart move when you consider that by the year 2019, there won’t be enough virgins left in America to keep the airline profitable anyway.

Major Shake-up Suggests Dinosaurs May Have UK Origin: New data indicates that the first dinosaurs may have originated in the Northern Hemisphere, possibly in an area that is now Britain. Perhaps, but one thing’s for sure, they certainly didn’t head over to Britain for all the great food.

Dog Seized For Being Part Wolf Allowed To Return Home: A pet dog that made international headlines after being seized from his family and accused of being part wolf by Animal Control officers in Aurora, Colorado, is finally being allowed to return home after DNA testing determined he was just a regular dog. So what if he was part wolf? I mean, who’s afraid of the big bad wolf? Meanwhile, the family said they’re just extremely grateful to have him back before the Trump Administration could have him deported.

Trump Wanted Military Tactical Vehicles for Inaugural Parade: E-mails obtained via the Freedom of Information Act show President Trump’s White House transition staff wanted the Pentagon to display a show of military tactical vehicles for his inaugural parade. Hell - forget about Putin, this guy wants to bring back Khrushchev and Brezhnev.

http://www.johnnyrobish.com

Baptist President Claims Christians Should Avoid Yoga: Southern Baptist Seminary President Albert Mohler is calling on all Christians to avoid practices such as yoga and meditation, proclaiming that they are not compatible with Christianity. Come to think of it, he may have a point. I’ve taken quite a few yoga classes and can’t recall them ever mentioning the importance of overthrowing foreign governments, persecuting intellectuals or intimidating homosexuals.

Human Waste Found in Coca-Cola Cans at Irish Coke Factory: An investigation has been launched after human waste was found in Coca-Cola cans arriving from Germany on a truck destined for the Coca-Cola facility in Lisburn, Ireland. Police speculate that immigrant workers may have used the cans as a toilet during the long journey across Europe. Well, all I can say is - everyone has to use the can now and then. So these guys used a can as a toilet? They must have thought it was “The Real Thing.” At least we now know that not all “Things Go Better With Coke.”