Car Wash Offering Free Sex After Nine Washes: Police in Kuala Lumpur have made arrests after getting wind of a car wash that was offering free sex after nine car washes. On a positive note, locals say its pretty darn hard to find a dirty car in Kuala Lumpur these days.
Georgian Neo-Nazis Throw Sausages at Vegans: A screening of the Adult Swim series Rick and Morty at the Kiwi vegan cafe in the country of Georgia was interrupted when a group of neo-fascist skinheads entered and began throwing grilled meat, fish and sausages inside. Good grief, I believe that was about the wurst story I’ve ever read. What was their beef with the vegans anyway? Didn’t anyone bother to tell these neo-Nazis that Hitler was a vegetarian? Meanwhile, at the scene of the crime, witnesses were being grilled by the police. Sure hope these two factions can reconcile - always nice to see a meating of minds.
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Blobfish Voted World’s Ugliest Animal: In a vote announced at the British Science Festival, the blobfish was voted the “World’s Ugliest Animal” and is now the mascot of the Ugly Animal Preservation Society. Not to be mean, but it does kind of remind me of something I coughed-up the last I had a bad cold. On the other hand, in all fairness, this picture was taken when it didn’t have any makeup on. I mean, couldn’t they have at least used a picture where it was smiling?
What Surgeons Leave Behind Can Cost Patients Dearly: More than a dozen times a day, doctors sew up patients with sponges and other instruments mistakenly left inside which can end up costing patients dearly. I suppose I’m lucky then, all my surgeon left behind was his bill.
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Ohio Man Who Ate Half of Roommate's Brain Denied Parole: Prison officials say Ohio inmate David Allen Chapin, who killed his roommate and ate half of his brain almost 40 years ago, has been denied parole for the sixth time. Legal experts say Chapin really blew his chances by telling the parole board how much he longed for a home-cooked meal. When originally arrested, Chapin justified eating his roommate’s brain by saying that “a mind is a terrible thing to waste.” As for me, I find this just disgusting. Why I have half a mind to…
Mexican President Compares Trump to Hitler and Mussolini: Mexico’s president Enrique Peña Nieto has said his country will not pay for presidential hopeful Donald Trump's wall along the U.S.-Mexico border, and likened his strident tone to the ascent of dictators like Adolf Hitler and Benito Mussolini. Now I don’t know about Hitler, but with hair like that, Trump definitely puts the “mousse" in Mussolini.
Study Says Leopard’s Spots Help Regulate Body Temperature: A new study suggests that a leopard’s spots may have more to do with regulating the animal’s body temperature than providing camouflage as was previously believed. This information sounds spot-on. My question is, if a leopard became too hot, would it have to change its spots?
Orioles Catcher Caleb Joseph Suffers Testicular Injury: The Baltimore Orioles have placed catcher Caleb Joseph on the disabled list after suffering a serious testicular injury as a result of a foul ball. Wow, that’s just nuts - it was a “foul ball” indeed. Sounds to me like it must have been a “breaking ball.” The count was 1 ball and 2 strikes. The poor guy’s gotta be thinking, “perhaps a 9-5 office job doesn't sound so bad after all.” And yes, this is the one time when you’re allowed to cry in baseball. Medical personnel treating Joseph described the injury as serious enough that in some states, he’d be permitted to use the ladies room.
