When Margaret died six years ago, my world changed.
I was in mourning, feeling grief and sorrow. And, no matter what I told myself, no amount of caregiving could have given her more time.
Even though I was glad Margaret and I decided to bring her home from the hospital where she would be most comfortable, her departure left me with a heavy darkness and a sense of having no power or control.
It took time but little by little I began to live my life again. I began to spend more time again at the office taking care of business. I also found I was able to become involved again in various agencies and organizations I had long been part of. I made the effort to put some segments of my life back together and learned, along the way, there were no rules about how I should feel and there was right or wrong way to mourn.
Here are some tips to help you find your way:
• Be good to yourself. Grief can be tough. Regular healthy meals, exercise, fresh air and sleep can make a real difference. Drinking and medications might hinder your healing process.
• Connect with caring friends. Let others know you want to talk about your loss.
• Consider a grief support group. Sharing with others who are also grieving can help you remember that you are not alone.
• Avoid making major life or career changes right away. Relocating or switching careers in the midst of the grief’s roller coaster of emotions may not be clearly made decisions.
• If you’re having trouble taking care of your everyday activities, like getting dressed or fixing meals, seek professional, medical attention. You deserve it.
Remember grief is a deeply personal experience and only you can decide what is right for you.
