Caregivers devote themselves to caring for a loved one. They spend countless hours (days, months, years) thinking about, acting on, and planning for the needs of their dependent family members. It’s fair to say that their caregiving muscles get quite a work-out. That they develop habits and routines that are designed to keep all systems going.
So what happens when the day comes that you no longer need to take care of your loved one? He or she may have placed in a care facility that provides hands-on support and medical attention. Or maybe, regrettably, that person is no longer among the living.
For some caregivers this time can be a relief, for others it can be a shock.
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Here are some tips to help you navigate what will be the next phase of YOUR life:
1. Loss: The grief may consume your attention so for a while you may not need to address what changes in your life will be like. Allow yourself the sorrow and know that you were there when it mattered most.
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Considered attending a bereavement group for support. In some cases, hospice and faith-based groups are designed specifically for family caregivers.
2. Recover: You have been on a journey filled with unexpected twists and turns. This can leave you exhausted. Over-used caregiving muscles need a break from time to time, but most caregivers just keep pressing ahead until these muscles have stretched. To recharge, take time to gather up your resources and strength.
Rest, relaxation, and a bit of pampering are not only remedies, they are well-deserved.
3. Friendships: As caregivers you often have had to place your own social needs on the back burner. Along the way, you may have lost touch with special people in your life.
Now is the time to reach out and re-connect. Most of them will understand that you had to focus upon taking care of a loved one. Many will appreciate your ability, strength, and commitment to persevere even though it may have left you feeling isolated.
For more resources, check out Caregiver Action Network.
J. Dietrich Stroeh is author of Three Months: A Caregiving Journey from Heartbreak to Healing (FolkHeart Press) and two free e-books. For more information, click here.
