A View From the Deck: Un, Put Away Your Toys NOW!

No matter if you’re a Democrat or Republican, Conservative or Liberal, one thing you have to agree on is this:

The ‘Beloved’ leader of North Korea, Kim Jong Un, needs to be put over our collective knee and have the living tar whipped out of him.

This suggestion comes after that cute, rotund little bundle of inbred intellect said on Tuesday that North Korea was going to end the cease fire that ended the Korean War. The government in Pyongyang threatened ‘surgical strikes’ in order to ‘unify’ the Korean peninsula.

Responding to the threat, US Ambassador to the United Nations Susan Rice said that the UN would “tighten sanctions on the regime, with the goal of reining in Pyongyang's nuclear and ballistic missile programs.” Sanctions that North Korea has, thus far, chosen to ignore.

Sanctions, shmanctions. First of all, does anyone really believe that this immature, impetuous, mentally-challenged little pipsqueak is actually in charge of a men’s room urinal, let alone North Korea? This is a guy who was voted ‘sexiest man alive' (by the Onion, and the populace believed it), and has, according to government sources, even walked on the moon. Just a few days ago, North Korea, a highly-closed society, announced the birth of Un’s first child. How does one go from celebrating the birth of a child to threatening a nuclear holocaust? Perhaps he’s experiencing post-partum depression? Maybe Dennis Rodman’s recent visit and Un’s envy over the former NBA star’s various piercings and tattoos made him want to be more secure in his manhood?

Maybe he’s just nuts?

Regardless, nuclear weapons in the hands of an unstable, unpredictable government like that of North Korea is nothing to take lightly. And when that government threatens the balance of peace, with statements containing the words ‘surgical strikes,’ it’s past time to do a bit more than threaten additional sanctions, especially when they are coming from an organization like the UN, whose track record in enforcing said sanctions has been far less than stellar.

But just to humor the UN, let’s take a look at the proposed sanctions.

Ambassador Rice states that the sanctions “will significantly impede North Korea's ability to develop further its illicit nuclear and ballistic missile programs. The draft resolution targets for thefirst time the illicit activities of North Korean diplomats, the country's illicit banking relationships, and its illegal transfers of bulk, and adds new travel restrictions.”

Wow, yeah, that’ll teach ‘em. Travel restrictions. Bet that makes them shake in their hobnailed boots…uh…cardboard sandals. And ‘illicit activities of diplomats, and banking relationships?’ Isn’t that business as usual for almost any nation?

I guess the point that I’m trying to make is that North Korea is not losing sleep over having further sanctions leveled on it by an organization with the oxymoronic name like that of the ‘United Nations.’ We would be better off taking Un’s nuclear toys away from him, spanking his behind red, sending him to his room without any supper, and restricting the number of trips he can take to the moon in a given time period. If we're really lucky, he'll stay there.

I can dream, can’t I?

But in the real world, the UN will impose additional sanctions, North Korea will ignore them and continue its nuclear testing, Kim Jong Un will host ‘Saturday Night Live,’ and every single one of us will eventually wish that the UN had done more. The international community has got to take a stronger stance with this lunatic fringe regime, including, but not limited to, shutting off ALL aid and instituting blockades. And if they dare give the slightest hint of using those nuclear weapons...

Well, let my motto speak for itself.

Sic vis Pacem, Parabellum