The Stokes Report: Making Your Point On Political Change

Election season always brings out the sloganeers. We have all heard ones like “Change you can believe in,” “A better tomorrow,” “It’s morning in America” and “Hope and change.”  

Every political campaign spends a great deal of time trying to create a “brand” for its campaign that enlists the support of the people. George W. Bush captured the pulse of the nation with the slogan “Compassionate Conservatism.” His father did the same with “A thousand points of light.” Barack Obama drew people behind him with a vision of “Change you can believe in.”  

In our local elections, we do the same thing with slogans, like “A better Enfield” and “Proven leadership, real results.” All for the purpose of gaining support from a majority of people.  

Even non-politicians have gotten into the game, creating Facebook pages with titles that are meant to solicit people and engage them in dialog. So, we all see and understand that titles, slogans and mottos have a way of stimulating conversation.  

But what happens when people do finally show up and get involved in the debate? Are our discussions actually being heard and pondered upon by those running for office? Are we actually effecting change, or are we solidifying someone’s predetermined opinions by our attitudes, approach and arguing?  

Well, here is where I want to focus in this article. How do we as citizens create the change we want? What is the best method for convincing someone of our ideas and viewpoints? And how do we get someone to change his or her mind about the direction we are heading?  

The first thing to do is to begin by respecting the system and the people running for office. I have been involved in local politics for twenty years and can assure you that if approached with disrespect and demeaning tones, I quickly revert to a defensive mindset. It is not a good thing, but it is the natural human response when placed in a negative situation.  

I think I can truly say that when I am approached in a respectful manner, I usually thrive in good conversation with an open mind. I think we all are that way. Communication skills that begin with kindness and respect are the fastest way to convince someone of your opinion.  

Another thing to take into consideration is that not everyone knows equal amounts of information. You may have expertise in a subject that the person who you are attempting to change does not. Approaching someone with an attitude of really wanting to enlighten them is important. How you do it is even more important.  

If you attack their viewpoint without having a healthy discussion on why they feel that way or how they attained their position, it is only going to create a barrier in communicating. But if you address the issues with calmness and willingness to listen as well as being heard, you just may be surprised by the outcome.  

Third, don’t manipulate people, use half-truths and share information out of context. If we really want answers to questions and desire change, then we need a reputation for being ethical. We all have seen people share partial or limited information and then lead people into thinking that is the full position or ideology of a candidate.  

We all know who in a community is sincerely attempting to get information out so that people can make a conscious decision on Election Day. We also know that there are always a few who will spin the information to demean someone or pollute your vote. If people gain a reputation for misusing a candidate’s words, you can count on candidates being leery of them. And the end result is that change will be hindered and a community will be robbed of what could have been possible.  

Then we come to the tough one: How do we handle someone we totally disagree with? I was taught that it’s best to disagree agreeably. Issues of government need to be debated, argued and heartily proposed. But in a democracy, sometimes we win the decision, and sometimes we lose the decision. That is the beauty of America. We can disagree with leaders, speak out against their viewpoints and even lobby for our way.  

But when the line is crossed and personalities are more important than policies, we lose the argument. We need to remember two things. We have a right to our opinions and convictions, and so does the other person.  

Another thing to consider is that how you handle things when you don’t get your way will greatly influence whether you are listened to again. I have won some arguments, and I have lost some arguments. But my attitude is always “What’s next?”; I don’t take it all personally.  

Now, here is some advice to those who truly want to influence candidates in this election year. First, talk personally to them, either on the phone or face-to-face. Don’t just use social media or things like that to vent your frustration or state your opinions. Make the conversation personal and respectful.  

Second, present your ideas clearly and then listen to the candidate for his or her ideas. Find common agreement and build on that so that you can achieve a positive outcome.  

Third, create an atmosphere that leaves the door open for more dialog. The attitude of taking your ball and going home will not gain anything. Remember, the issue you are dealing with is just one of many. You don’t want to create barriers for future discussions.  

I close this article by saying that I believe everyone running has good intentions and wants what is best for Enfield. To be honest, there is more we agree on than disagree on. I believe every candidate wants and needs to listen to our citizens. Let’s build bridges to cross, not dams to separate.

The author is a Republican seeking an at-large seat on the Town Council, and is currently Chairman of the Enfield Board of Education.