Obituary: Philomena Zarra Frieri, 87

Information via Maresca & Sons Funeral Home

Philomena Zarra Frieri, nee Filomena, age 87, of New Haven, died December 2, 2018. She was the widow of Joseph Frieri.

Survivors include daughter Carmela Congdon of Stonington, granddaughter Pamela (Shawn) Bates of Medfield, MA and great granddaughters Harper Bates and Tessa Bates, brothers Ralph (Diane) Zarra of North Haven and Ernesto (Anna) Zarra of Cheshire; sisters Maria Grieco of Oliveto Citra, Salerno, Italy, Gerardina Renna of North Haven and Natalina Zarra of Cheshire. She was predeceased by sisters Annunziata Grieco and Delia Fiore; brothers Joseph Zarra and Basilio Zarra; and stepson John Frieri (aka Johnny Parris).

Philomena was born in Conza della Campania in the province of Avellino, Italy in 1931. She married Joseph Frieri (nee Giuseppe) in Naples in 1948 and immigrated to the United States, settling in New Haven. She worked in the local garment industry, at the A.C. Gilbert Company, Winchester Division of Olin Industries, the Henry-Richards Company, and Sperry & Barnes Division of Swift & Co.

In the early years, she helped her husband in his shoe repair business. Philomena and Joseph operated a seasonal ice cream truck business for several years during the 1960's and 1970's, selling in local neighborhoods, and providing quick refreshments to Yale students and staff on the corner of Elm & High Streets.

After Joseph’s passing, she provided child care services to local families, as well as delicious homemade meals for the children in her care. Her home was always open to visits from neighbors and family, especially extended stays for nieces and nephews. It was always an adventure staying with Zia Philomena.

She spent several weeks with her granddaughter just after her birth, and they developed a close bond which remained strong for the past 39 years. La famiglia (family) was everything to Philomena. She made many friends over the years, but her extended Italian family members were the light of her life. Her devotion, love and support were felt by all during good times as well as more challenging times.

As a 17-year old teenager, she married a family acquaintance in post-war Italy, traveled across the Atlantic on an ocean liner with her new husband, a U.S. citizen, and his 4-year old son from a previous marriage. She arrived in New York, not knowing the language or culture, settled in Connecticut and worked in sweatshops and factories to help support her new family. She persevered and thrived in her new country. At age 47 she lost her husband to cancer, and maintained her two-family home and property.

Philomena never learned to drive, but that didn’t stop her. She used the bus transit system to visit all of her family in the greater New Haven area, to go shopping, run errands, and take her young children to the beach. She had great strength and determination, loved her neighbors like family, and loved connecting with people at home and in her travels.

Two highlights of Philomena’s life were a three-week trip to Italy with her daughter and granddaughter to visit family and tour her homeland and the wedding of her granddaughter.

Donations in her memory may be made to CurePSP (psp.com), a non-profit organization with research programs into treatments and cure for brain diseases, or to the Children’s Center of Hamden.

Heartfelt thanks go out to the staff at Yale New Haven Health and Masonicare Hospice and ACU in Wallingford for their kind and gentle treatment of our loved one.

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