At a press conference surrounded by lawyers in the Oval Office, Trump declared he would come clean regarding his Russian connections, if the recent Presidential election results were given immunity. A smiling Trump also offered to provide his 2015 tax returns. He said the 2,563-page document will be available on twitter.
Tax return leaks to the media included a five billion dollar write off for give-away Bikinis at Trump resorts. One Trillion in defaults to Venezuelan and Greek banks as well as write-offs for a 1000 cases of Highland Malt Scotch. Trump showed no remorse when questioned about his impact on Greece and Venezuela economies. Business is business claimed a contrite President. When questioned about the liquor, he claimed, “W.C. Fields did it – so why not me?” As for the Bikinis, he refused to comment as he felt the reasons were obvious.
“I need to bring credibility and respect to my Presidency and members of my administration.”
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Media questions veered to increasing tensions with N. Korea. Trumps response to concerns of War queried by a Mother Jones reporter. “Our nuclear arsenal is a hundred times larger than N. Korea. We will drop 100 nuclear bombs for every bomb they drop on our cities. We have the capability of reducing N. Korea to Ashes. My militaries have assured me of an immediate response.”
Recently Fox news reported that that the Trump Administration had hired thirty-five round the clock English translators to assist the President. Fox anchor Bret Baier asked why Trump needed English translators? Trump said that he had found it impossible to understand British, Irish and Scottish leaders. Even worse was his inability to understand Southern U.S. Congressman. As for the women, he really didn’t care what they said, that wasn’t a problem. The translators would allow him to interpret what these people say. Trump said his goodbyes and headed off to Mar-a-lago.
