Lauren Book—With Hope for the Future

Being a victim of childhood sexual abuse and making it through to the other side takes work and courage.

Emerging as a survivor rather than staying forever a victim takes empathy, understanding, and a willingness to focus on others rather than on self. Lauren Book appears to have all three.

Her childhood abuse over a period of years at the hands of her nanny motivated her to work with other young victims. Like everyone who sincerely cares about the fate of sexual abuse survivors, her ultimate goal is, according to her interview with the Miami Herald (3/31/13), not just helping young victims but preventing child sexual abuse.

This goal led her to an interview with a convicted and incarcerated inmate in Florida’s civil commitment facility. She felt that understanding his perspective was essential. She treated him with respect and dignity, and it was returned to her.

There are those who feel all who sexually offend, and especially those whom society deems the worst offenders, should be locked away forever, incapable of changing, unworthy of redemption, and certainly not worth understanding. Book labels as “…very, very, very important” the work being done to instill in these men empathy and awareness of the harm they have done, with the goal of restoring them to society as healthy, contributing citizens.

There are those who feel all victims will be forever damaged, unable to move on. Book refuses to place her experience and her pain at the center of her world. She looks outward and forward, and she clearly feels all people have worth and value and are worth saving.

Of the things that the inmate she met with said, this seems, to this writer, the most significant: “…he said he's learning how to maintain a healthy self-esteem, knowing that feelings of loneliness or negative self-worth might lead him to seek fulfillment in unhealthy ways.”

The reality of life on a public sex offender registry seems to make a mockery of those words. Whether registered for an offense small or great, for one committed twenty years ago with no re-offense since or one committed yesterday, and regardless of the situation or circumstances, our system nor our attitudes lead to a “healthy self-esteem” or are designed to stave off “feelings of loneliness or negative self-worth.”

Restrictions as to where a registrant may live, work, and go lead to ostracism, isolation and loneliness, often keeping the registrant separated from family, treatment, and all support services and all too often resulting in homelessness and hopelessness.

Public registration and community notification close the doors to employment opportunities and housing options and close the hearts of many living in the community. Vigilante threats and actions against registrants, their property, and their families increase fear and isolation. Negative comments and insulting terms appearing in print on a daily basis do not build self-worth.

Lauren Book has every right to hold bitter feelings and express hostility toward anyone labeled a “sex offender.” She knows, however, that such feelings are not only selfish and non-productive to society but also that they could increase the risk of a re-offense and another victim.

Many who use the harshest language and stridently advocate the harshest treatment toward those on the registry are those who proclaim the loudest that they do so because they care about the victims and “speak for them.”

I don’t think Lauren Book would agree.