Americans surrender, beg Russia not to release Trump video!

Our worst fears were realized today when America was brought to its knees with US leaders begging Russia not to release compromising videos of President-elect Trump fearing that it would be too much for the public to handle.

Republican Senator Lindsey Graham decried “First we endured hearing Trump talk about groping women, then I about lost my grits when I saw the naked Trump statue, and now there is a video of him fornicating? For Gawd’s sake, have mercy on us. It is a Weapon of Mass Repulsion and just the knowledge that it exist makes my stomach churn. You win Russia, we will do whatever you say, just please don’t release that video”.