Pam Bondi not right combo of corrupt or hot!

Last Thursday the Trump Cabinet Committee revealed why Florida Attorney General Pam Bondi did not receive a coveted position in the Trump Cabinet, explaining that she did not meet their standards of either corruption or being “hot enough”. A spokesperson explained that although Pam had received $25,000 from Trump to ignore the Trump University lawsuit, that was small change and just not the kind of “Big League” qualifications we were looking for. “A clear indication of poor corruption skills; she bit too soon, had she held out for more money, that might have gotten her to the next level”.

Then there was the hotness category. Affectionately known as “Buy Me Bondi", Pam is roundly considered hot in Florida, but here at the Capitol Hill Trump University campus that only translates to a 6 or 7. “We have to have someone with that certain je ne sais quoi, they have to be gropelicious, so hot that you reflexively want to grab their…well, you know what I mean, and she just didn’t rise to that level”.

Now one category can compensate for the other, but in Pam's case she was not considered qualified in either category. But she will get reconsidered when she loses her job as Attorney General in 2018.