Dating Over 40 & Finding “Perfection”

By: Kenneth Stepp

Perfect…… What is an unfair title to project onto anyone. And to be searching for someone with that attribute is simply delusional. It just doesn’t exist. If you find someone like this. WAIT. It will fade. No one is perfect. My reason for writing about perfection in a partner is that in a strange twist. I believe it can be attained. Not because a human can be perfect. But, because a person can consistently be perfect for someone else. Love is the key.

“So tell me something about you, I don’t know”. This was a question a girl asked me on an online dating site. I thought it was a funny question, since we hadn’t met. So, I answered it in my funny voice.

“My psychiatrist said I can talk to REAL people now. My parole officer is taking my anklet off next week. And I have never killed anyone on a Tuesday.”

It’s been months since I gave her that answer. I never did find out what she thought of it. Time to get back to love. Real love. Unlimited, unmerited, and unstoppable love. This love has many life altering traits. It is forever. It forgives and forgets. But, the very best trait, in my opinion is that it sees no fault. No flaws. I have had this love before. Meaning. I still have it. I wasn’t kidding about it being forever. If you love a person with real love and don’t speak for 20 years. You still love them. It never even fades. When I look at her, think of her, or talk about her. She is perfect to me. I may not want her to be. Love is blind. I’ve heard this before. Thought it was crazy. Now, I live it.

This isn’t to say my logical mind has nothing to say about it. They are at odds with one another. Imagine if she and I were still a couple. My logical mind would cease being at odds with love and allow me to be with Ms Right. What a wonderful thought. To be with my dream girl for the rest of my life. Spending what’s left of me serving, loving, and honoring the perfect girl for me. That sounds amazing. But, is it realistic. Hardly.

There I go. Raining on parades again. The reality is that almost everyone in the dating cesspool believes they can love unconditionally. From my studies, hardly any really can. It is my belief that they almost all want to. Baggage, damage, and paranoia. These have taken over to some degree or another. They are barriers, or at least can be.

Soulmates

Are soulmates real? I receive mixed answers on this one. I not only have an opinion (surprise), but I can explain why I arrived at my opinion. I’ll unpack that. I believe that when two people that have the capacity to love unconditionally meet. And they have this tremendous love for one another. They can be soulmates. Most likely they will be. They will always be with Mr or Ms Perfect. They will simply see perfect when they see one another. Can you imagine this life? It would be amazing. It would be however, very unlikely to happen. If I’m right about my theory, it almost never happens. But hey. I’m still standing. Hoping….

k@kstepp.com

Founder, American Angel Works