Over 40 Dating "The Learning Curve"

By: Kenneth Stepp

Becoming qualified to speak about this subject is not possible. Mostly, because there are no rules. And there are many. Rules are individual things. Uniquely created for each person. They all make their own rules. When I was dating, back in the day. I always opened the door for a lady. Now, I find myself in a sprint to get to the door first to achieve this. When I ask, “why don’t you wait for me to get the door?” I’m told that guys don’t do that anymore. So, they don’t wait any more. Rules? My learning curve is very curvey.

“The world is a tragedy to those who feel, but a comedy to those who think.” - Horace Walpole

There are too many of these to mention here. And most are unique to that one person. The door thing is prevalent. The days of knowing what to do are gone. I have been on many dates in the last year. I have yet to do dinner and a movie. Or a nightclub. Probably the most traditional thing I have found myself doing was to have dinner with a girl and her mom at her house. It was very nice. This, I can do.

Anywhere - Anytime

I fit just about anywhere. I can work any crowd. Unlike some men. I love hanging out with a family. I like being a part of “The Tribe”. If family needed to live with us after we decided we were right for one another. I’d be fine with it. Not sure that would have been the case way back then. Today, we are all new again. Except for the old baggage of course. Baggage may be the main culprit behind these big changes I am finding. Sprinkle a little damage on top and you have a volcano of subsurface emotions, waiting to blow up.

“One thing you can't hide - is when you're crippled inside.” - John Lennon

Finding my way along the journey to my forever has been difficult, painful, and confusing. I wish I could say it was fun. It hasn’t been until recently. I made the decision to have a life alone. And I am thriving. I “Explore”. I visit small historic towns and explore them. And, I have begun getting paid for it too. Not to mention, free meals, having elected leaders give me private tours of their towns, and investigating things the general public doesn’t get to see. Sweet!

“Cash in on passion. Do what you love. Love what you do” - Susie Mathews

Isn’t life funny? Maybe even ironic? The very thing I use to do to stay sane, but had to limit myself because it kept me broke. Has become what supplies my bank account. I love it. Today is going to be a great day too. I woke up at 4:00 AM, began doing my nonprofit work. That usually takes 3 hours. But, no one gets helped, if this doesn’t get done. Another passion of mine. When my business experienced a theft of over one million dollars. My family lost everything. We went from having a lot, to having nothing. We lost our 3 homes, properties, and assets in one day. It was devastating. Them going to prison, did little for us. This is why I founded American Angel Works. To help others in that situation.

I believe in this game we call sigle over 40, that one word, if taken to heart can change the experience into something fun. “Respect”. It seems to be missing for many. Add two more words, “Acceptance & Forgiveness”. And lifetime relationships can flourish again. Not easy. But doable. Look inside. Change what you can. Accept what you cannot.

k@kstepp.com

Founder, American Angel Works