Active Parent vs. Passive Parent

When I first let my son play at the Kidgits area at the Mall of Georgia, I told myself that I was not going to allow him to be bullied or allow him to bully anyone else. I had no problem telling other kids to stop pushing on him and vice versa. As I looked around the play area I noticed that other parents allowed their children to push, kick, chase and intimidate other kids. There were even times where parents were not even watching their children get into mini-toddler fights. And I thought to myself, how can you be a parent and not constantly be watching your child's actions? Not just their actions on the playground, but their actions in school, at home, everywhere. Some parents might say, “Well, I know my child.” But I ask how do you know your child if you're not truly paying attention to what they are doing?

As parents it is our job to know our children and be involved with everything that is going on with them. When I say involved, I mean know what is going on in their life and be an active parent rather than a passive one. An active parent asks questions to the teacher, the friends, the parents of the friends, the coach, the internet social networking sites and of course, the child. The active parent actively seeks information about their child's grades and what it takes to get their child to the next level. An active parent looks at their child's cell phone text messages and checks their rooms. This is the kind of parent that does not allow society to dictate the amount of privacy their child should have. The active parent follows the activities of their child from Lawrenceville Elementary to Crews Middle School to Central Gwinnett High School

The passive parent has absolutely no idea when report cards are coming out and depends on their child to tell them. Some parents might say that the passive parent trusts their child to do the right thing. And that is definitely true for many children, but the trustworthy kids are usually the ones who are very mature for their age and more often than not have taken on the role of the parent. The passive parent does not attempt to connect with the parents of their child's friends. For example, if their child is spending the night at a friend's house, the passive parent just drops their child off. The passive parent is just that... passive. This does not belittle the love they have for their child, it just means that their biggest concern is not focused on their child. Which usually means the passive parent knows the least about their child.

Our actions with our children have a great influence on the decisions they will make in the future. Although children will become adults and will have the freedom to make their own decisions, it is the involvement that we as parents have in their life now that gives them wisdom for the future. So I ask you which one are you? Are you active or are you passive?