What Rep. Weiner's Mistake Says About Men

U.S. Representative Tony Weiner got caught sexting his namesake to a California co-ed. After all, what did we expect from a man named Weiner? I don't know which is more surprising - that a top government figure can't keep Oscar Meyer in its bun or that he was egotistical enough to think the girl on the other end of his message wanted to see that.

Neither is surprising, to be sure.  Look at all the men who were at the pinnacle of power, and risked it everything for a little peccadillo.  Arnold Schwarzenegger - married to the beautiful and sophisticated Maria Shriver - sleeps with his housekeeper and produces a love child. South Carolina Governor Mark Sanford disappears on an impromtpou personal leave to meet up with his paramour in Argentina.  Bill Clinton. Grover Cleveland. King David.

But it's not just political figures. Look at all the pastors who fell from their pedestals:  Jim Bakker. Jimmy Swaggart. Henry Ward Beecher. And we'll never know about Bishop Eddie Long.

What's the difference between these powerful, public figures and the rest of us guys? Only that they are powerful and public, and we're not.  Heck, we all know some guy at work, or church, or at the bowling league or the country club, who threw it all away for a piece of ... er... the action. Heck, again, maybe that guy is us.

What makes us guys think with the head that's not on our shoulders?  Everybody blames biology.  I suspect, however, that there's something more: male ego.  As we age, our libido decreases. Can't be helped. Again, it's biology.  And the more our performance flags, the more we feel the need to prove otherwise. It's not really lust that gets us in trouble, but our fear of impotence.

Or, more fundamentally, our fear of death.  If we're really good at deluding ourselves, we might make it to 45 or 50 before we realize that we are not immortal.  Eventually, however, we can no longer fool ourselves. Death becomes us. And so we try to live like the gods - the Greek ones - and pretend we're immortal.  I think that's what's behind the lust for sex, for power, for money, for fame. It's the Quixotic quest to have our memory outlive our physical bodies.

It's not an excuse, though. Just an explanation.  We're supposed to be moral beings. That's what separates us from the animals, right? On the other hand, my dog is much more trustworthy and consistent than I am.