Where's Sasha? Internet Wants To Know Obama Daughter's Whereabouts During Speech Because It's The Internet

CHICAGO, IL — Consider it another example of the personality-obsessed, social media-fueled early 21st century we live in: After President Barack Obama delivered his farewell address Tuesday night in Chicago, one of the burning topics of online conversation wasn't about the outgoing chief executive's call to service to U.S. citizens when it comes to defending the nation against threats to democracy.

Nor was it his appeal for understanding and solidarity — racially and politically — as a way for the country to come together going forward.

No, the big buzz that spread almost immediately after Obama's speech had to do with the whereabouts of Sasha, the president's youngest daughter.

The 15-year-old's absence was noticeable toward the end of the address, as an emotional and tearful Obama expressed his love for the first lady and his daughters, Malia and Sasha, and thanked them for their support throughout their eight years in the White House. While First Lady Michelle Obama and 18-year-old Malia Obama could be seen on camera during this touching moment, Sasha was nowhere to be found.

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That's when people on the internet did two of the three things they do best¹: Butt into famous people's business and wildly speculate. Even if the curiosity was genuine as #WhereIsSasha and #WheresSasha began popping up on social media, most guesses at her whereabouts were meant to be humorous:

The real reason Sasha wasn't sitting next to her mom and sister in Chicago? She stayed in Washington, D.C., because she had an exam Wednesday morning, the Washington Post reports. Sasha goes to the exclusive Sidwell Friends school, which stipulates that being out of town isn't a sufficient excuse to miss or reschedule a test, the report added.

Apparently, a note from the leader of the free world won't cut it, either.

While the reason for Sasha's absence wasn't salacious or scandalous, the explanation did leave students across the country deflated, knowing that the bar for any kind of excused school absence had been set impossibly high²:

More via the Washington Post

Footnotes

¹Posting videos of kitties doing cute things is the third thing people on the internet excel at. When aliens visit Earth in the next seven years, it will be that skill that will impress them the most.

²Teachers of America, Sasha Obama should receive a special award from you because she is the example you can use from now on to reject any student's excuse for missing an exam or homework deadline.

President Barack Obama and First Lady Michelle Obama with their daughters, Malia (left) and Sasha. (photo by Pete Souza, The White House | Wikimedia Commons)

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