Neighbor News
'Ask Debbie Sue' Dating advice with author & comedian Debbie Sue Goodman
Debbie Sue is an author of the books, 'Still Single' 'Still Dating' & 'My Husband the Stranger.' www.stillsingle.org
My heart goes out to all those affected by Hurricane Irma. My thoughts and prayers are with you.
This month I received many letters from single women with a similar question. 'What should I do if I'm 'dating a slob?' It reminds me of a date I went on years ago. I'm including the story in this column. I’m getting a big kick out of the ideas my readers are sending on how to find “Mr. Right & Miss Right.” A lot of audience members in my comedy shows enjoyed this story. I had a great time performing at the Skokie Theatre short play fest a couple of weeks ago. I performed my short play, 'Dating Dilemmas' with my dear friend Roberta .
This week I’m including one letter from a reader about this topic-'Dating a Slob.' Sometimes you can meet someone single in unusual ways. Or, by just doing an activity you enjoy. I always enjoy going for long walks. I like working out at the health club. I like walking the track. You never know who you might meet while you're walking or jogging along the track. It doesn't really matter what someone is wearing if you enjoy their company. You can be subtle & 'suggest' they change their shirt or wear a different outfit the next time you see them. It's probably best to wait until you've been dating them awhile before suggesting a change of attire.
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Several years ago, I met a single guy while I was working out at the health club. He was wearing a wrinkled dirty t-shirt, cut off shorts and his hair was a bit messy. I figured it was because he was working out at the club. We spoke, exchanged phone numbers and set up a dinner date. We went out a few times. He dressed a bit sloppy each time. But, he was friendly. After a few dates, he met my mom. I called her after the date to ask her what she thought about him.
I said, “Mom, Did you like him? Do you think he’s a sloppy dresser?" She replied, “I’m not answering that question.” I said, “Please, tell me your opinion. Do you think he’s a slob?” She replied, “I don’t want you to be upset. I refuse to answer.” I said, “I know you don't want to give your opinion. But, I need to know.. Do you think he’s one of the worst dressed men I ever went out with?” She replied, “No, I wouldn’t say THAT.” I said, “Well, that’s good to hear.” She replied loudly, “He’s not ONE of the worst dressed men, He is THEE worst!!”
Find out what's happening in Skokiefor free with the latest updates from Patch.
Christy writes, “Dear Debbie Sue, I’m a 40 something year old divorced woman. The holidays are a sad time for me. I'm dreading all the upcoming holidays. I always enjoyed spending Christmas & New Years with my husband. I don’t have a large family. I left my husband almost 2 years ago. We're divorced. He was having an affair with a woman he met at a bar. I loved him and trusted him. Then, I found out he was lying throughout our marriage. I still miss him, the friendship and companionship. We shared many good times. I’ve been lonely and would like to e-mail him. Do you think I should? I have so much I’d like to say to him. I need to talk to him.”
Dear Christy, “It’s hard to move on after a husband has betrayed you and told you lies throughout your marriage. You divorced him for a good reason. If you insist on contacting him, then E-mail him and see if he answers you. Nothing ventured, nothing gained. The holidays are sometimes a sad time for singles. If he doesn’t answer you, please move on with your life. It will be hard to trust him even if you see him again. There are many men out there that won’t lie to you and won’t break your heart.”
To the woman that wrote & wants to remain anonymous: The man you're dating for 4 months certainly sounds like he has 2 different personalities. One is very giving & loving. The other is mean & condescending. One minute he's buying you gifts & taking you on trips all over the country. The next minute, he's being secretive & telling you stories that don't make sense to you. There are plenty of men out there that will treat you with respect. I'm sure you'll find the right one. You know the answer to your question already.
To the divorced woman that wrote & wants to remain anonymous: This man you met online, does not sound trust-worthy at all. You keep catching him in lies. He tells you he's with his friends, then you find out he was on a date with another woman. He tells you he's busy at work, then you see him shopping at a store with another woman. You gave him various gifts throughout the 6 months you've been dating. You said he never wore the shirts you gave him. He never gave you anything except heartache. It's time to move on & find a man you can trust.
Until next time… Keep smiling!
Debbie Sue
Send questions & comments to:
debrasue-60076@msn.com
Join Debbie Sue & friends for two fun upcoming shows:
September 28th at the Rock House 1742 Glenview Rd in Glenview at 8:00 PM.
October 14th at Euro Echo Café 7919 Lincoln AV in Skokie at 7:00 PM.
