Now I lay me down to sleep, I pray the Lord to give me that beauty that is supposed to come with said sleep! If I should die before I wake, don't give said beauty to anyone else!
As "they" say, we need our beauty sleep, every night I go to sleep, I wake up with deeper lines, pillow creases on my cheeks and heaven forbid the mascara from the day before wasn't removed, a face that is completely black. Beauty? I think not! There are not enough tea bags at the Lipton tea factory to remove the bags, heck, mine could be used to carry your groceries home in. I could save you the dime!, Or enough cucumbers at any grocery store for the morning eye swell! Some mornings I wake up looking like the heavy weight winner! All of you may have laugh lines from me, but I have lines that make up a road map!
There is an old joke that goes "My wife said she was going for a beauty sleep last night, I said okay, see you in 3 months." But I think the only one who has gotten it right so far is Sleeping Beauty.
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There is a reason Sleeping Beauty slept for 40 years because that's how long it takes to get sleep beautiful! However, her morning breath after 40 years would have taken a prince with no smell, wouldn't you agree?
I think when I go to sleep the Boogeyman is secretly hiding in my pillow, using my face as an etch a sketch, drawing on lines, creases, and wrinkles thinking to himself, all she has to do is iron them away in the morning. Guess what, this lady doesn't own an iron, but I know a great plastic surgeon!
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Sleep has also been shown to reduce wrinkles in the face and neck. This is because when we are asleep we sweat more, and this moisture on the skin smooth's out any lines. Those of us that are sweating are sweating because we are having hot flashes! If this were true, all of us exercise addicts would have flawless skin!
I am told that catnaps don't count as beauty sleep. well my cat is gorgeous, so I will keep on napping! You too?
Speaking of napping, I believe the real term here is 40 winks, heck, I'd take one wink at this point, and if I got it, that guy would probably be trying to get something out of his eye!
Some of us toss and turn for many reasons, husbands snoring, worrying, up late because you're "getting lucky", (a call back from last week folks!) but not in my house, oh no not mine, we invested in the sleep number mattress, my husband's number is 101 Main Street, and my number is 102 Main Street, problem solved, I am now gorgeous!
In reality, I'll skip the beauty sleep, give this lady skinny sleep!
Until next Friday!
Beth
