BLOG: A 'Happy' Valentine's Day Love Letter

Somewhere, some woman's kitchen will be very fragrant from the roses she receives. Carefully selected cards will be on top of TVs and little boxes waiting to be opened—revealing earrings, rings and other shiny things.

Reservations will be made, women taken out and Victoria's Secret will have a line halfway down the mall.

Women will look forward to having their backs massaged—their faces aglow from facials at spas. Ah, the thought of any and all of the above makes me tingle in delight. Here's a lighthearted look at a hypothetical love letter between a married couple with decades of love behind them. 

Husband to wife:

How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.

Thirty-three years ago, you taught me never to pay full price for anything! Sale, sale, sale—wait for it to go on sale was your motto.

So, yes, of course, I bought your carefully handpicked card as it was 50 percent off. Are you proud of me? As for your box of chocolates, you don't mind Santa Claus do you? I bought these in 2011 for 50 percent off so they should still be good right?

How am I doing so far? You should be really proud of me!

As for your flowers, I went out back and handpicked a bunch for you. I used a trash bag to hold them together. I knew that since you grew these yourself, you would love them. As for your spa day, well let's just say that after 33 years, to me, your face still glows. I can even see those frown lines (that you refer to as "laugh lines") at night. Some nights, they just glow in the dark while I watch you dream.

You must be dreaming about me, because your whole face lights up. And I figured that since we installed a shower massager, you would be mad at me if I paid full price for a massage elsewhere.

So, how do I love thee?

I love you with all of my half-price heart, always and forever yours!

Love,

Your husband

Wife to husband:

Dear husband, 

Back in April of 2011 I too was thinking ahead. I hope you enjoy your Peeps. Happy Valentines Day with all of my "50 percent off" heart. By the way, who needs all of the "fancy shmancy" presents when I have you!

Your 50 percent and my 50 percent equals 100, the perfect relationship.

Love,

Your wife

Have a great Valentines Day, for those like me that have been married forever. Small blue boxes always work!