When my son turned 12, it was clear he enjoyed basketball and had some natural talent. I wanted to encourage that, and make it easy for him to practice. Also, he could play ball with friends.
We live in a row of townhouses. There was an unassigned parking space where we could, maybe, place a portable basketball hoop (a weighted base with wheels, a steel poll, and a hoop at the top). I wanted to check the rules on that idea, so I attended an HOA board meeting at the community center. The HOA president at that time said, “No way. There will be lots of noise and fights.” Other board members agreed with that opinion.
“I see,” I said. “Let me look into that and get back to you.”
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So I wrote a letter and gave it to all the residents along the row, asking whether the hoop would be a problem. Would they support me putting one up? And would parents help supervise its use by children? The replies were 100% positive. I told my son that I would put the hoop away if there were any fights or problems. I said, “You might have to do your homework some evenings while other boys are playing ball.” He was good with all of that.
So I attended the next HOA board meeting and told them about the neighborhood consensus. Then I asked, “Is it against the rules to have a basketball hoop in a parking space on Hummingbird Terrace?
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“No, it’s not against the rules,” said the HOA president.
“Do you forbid us from putting one up?” I asked.
“No. Go ahead,” said the HOA president.
So I bought the system for about $500 and put it up in the unnumbered parking space. It was a great success. The kids, the boys especially, had fun practicing and playing games.
After two months, the hoop suddenly disappeared. A neighbor had seen a groundskeeper haul it away with a truck. I spoke to that man the next week and he said, “Yes, the property manager instructed me to take it away and bring it to the dump. That‘s what I did.”
It is painful to remember these events and to reflect on them now. I’m African American single mom with two children. I work full time for our public schools. “There will be lots of noise and fights.” Really? Due to the presence of a basketball hoop? Was that a racist remark? I will leave that determination up to others.
Life goes on. My son became very good at basketball and plays now at the collegiate level. Back then, I didn’t have another $500 to pay for a one-hour consultation with a lawyer to fight the HOA. I tried to provide positive experiences so that my children might forget this hurtful action by the HOA. But I have not forgotten. My adult children haven’t either.
If the residents of Quail Valley have lost their respect for the Quail Valley HOA, it’s because of instances of abuse like this. Once trust and respect are lost, they are not easily regained.
As told to Steven Sellers Lapham by “Cynthia” in July 2021. *** MuskratMusic@gmail.com
Part of the "Living on Cuckoo Court" series, at tinyurl.com/CuckooCourt
NOTES
1. A 2021 Maryland law prohibits “unreasonable” restrictions on basketball hoops in HOAs.
2. How might we begin the healing the harm that has been committed and covered up? What would a process of “making amends” look like involving the HOA board members, the community, and (with their consent) the family who experienced this crime? What would restitution be, to make this family whole? -S.S.L.
