LIFE

Sometimes we think or say "what is the meaning of life?".  We have obligations and a plan made way before we are born.  Rich or poor.  Celeberty or a regular Joe.  When i hear the tv ads and promotion on saying yes to Question 2 assisted suicide really hits home and hard with me.  My question to my audiance is "what is your take on question 2.?  My inner intuitive voice says NO on Question 2.  For many reasons.  I know seeing your loved one die right in front of you from a terrible disease or cancer sucks and you may say "why God?, its not fair".  If you have not been in this unfortunate sinario, thank God, but those who have seen it like me - its heartbraking, but i did watch my mom die, i held her hand and gave her medication to keep her comfortable and she had loved ones come and go and she got to say her good byes and was surrounded by love.  While we waited for God to take her left hand while i held her right hand at 2am on a cool April morning.  To put it bluntly, we all have lessons to learn in life and well i have a few good examples of what lessons i had to endure.  More losses.  My brother and sister.  Kathy died suddenly December 1 one sunny beautiful day the sun was setting later afternoon, driving home from Kittery after an afternoon of early Holiday shopping with her girl friends in her white mustang that made her feel so cool.  The sad twist to this story is for about 20 years i was under the impression the man who killed her supposingly had a heart attack went over double yellow lines and head one. Bang. He died, his wife was in comma for two years and Kathy died.  She saved her friends life by turning the car wheel to make it a more impact on her side.  Her two friends were seriously hurt but lived.  But for 20 years i was told he had a heart attack and that was what caused the accident.  Over the summer one of the girls approached me off guard to say "Ellen didn't you know the man wanted to kill himself and did it.  Taking Kathy with him"  Why and i finding this out now, i dont know why?  No regard to human life.  My loving, kind and awesome siser.  She was my BFF Best Friend Forever! She was a sunshine soul she was my only sister, who truly loved me.  The tragedy here not only for me and my parents and brother...but the girls her best friends forever did not get news of her death until a week later because they were recovering from serious injury's...can you imagine that tv and radio and newspapers off at the hospital so that they could not find out until they were well.  They did not attend the wake or funeral.  They were heartbroken for life.  came through told what really happened she apparently remembered him saying he wanted to end it all....yet he took my sister at 21. After a day of shopping in Newburyport for the Christmas holiday season.  Many years later, my brother ended his life because of his own troubles - he could not take life anymore.  Saddly he thought we was doing us a favor by killing himself. Finally, after two attemps the third time a charm.  Meanwhile my mom had an aggressive form of breast cancer she was battling while my brother did this. Removal of her breast, chemotherapy and daily radiation ~ and this disaster.  Tu bury another child.  Now i am left with no siblings, only memories.  My sister sunshine smiley face kind of girl who loved people and life, died way to young. Everytime i hear Rod Sterwart's "Forever Young" it says Kathy all over it.  She will always be my 'forever young best friend'.  Then my mom put up a huge fight with an aggressive form of breast cancer, that she battled for 12 years.  I went with her to her oncologist one day to see how she was doing and he said "you only have a week or two to live, I am sorry".  We were stunned.  Later that day sitting in my back yard on a nice April spring day the first visit from Hospice, drugs and comforts.  A step by step guide on what to expect.  To communicate and settle any thing that need be before entering heaven's gate.  Most important for my children they loved their nana so much.  We had last rights given by her parish priest and all was present her sister, me, my kids, her son in law, my dad....with tears, laughter and memories....this is the way ...God's way sometimes its not what we want, but its the rule of life.  I suggest read the Book of Job in the Old Testament to understand some of God's ways.  Each death has a reason, lesson and most importantly life is always in God's hands.  He has his reasons and someday we will know.  No rush to find out, because life is way too short. The Question 2 commercial's and the promotion of it really hits me hard.  I understand people do not want to see their loved one suffer but its not the way nature has planned for us.  We need to have faith and hope...most importantly be able to say good bye and let nature take its course.  Peace.