Keeping Your Sanity This Holiday Season

It is officially the holiday season, and while there's a nostalgic sweetness in the air and holiday sounds fill our ears, there is also an increase in our stress levels and the amount of rides we take on our emotional rollercoaster.

Holidays are about different things for different people- food, family, memories, religious affiliations.  One thing that adds to our stress is trying to live up to someone else's definition of the holiday season rather than our own. As you are making preparations for the upcoming holiday, start by identifying your definition of the holidays.

What do you hope to get out of this season (think outside the gift box)? What do you want to share with your family/friends?  What memories do you want to have that will get you through the long, cold winter?

In a society where most are struggling to make ends meet, gift buying especially adds a burden.  As a therapist, I am always amazed to hear of people who can't afford their copay to have an annual physical, but are able to purchase the next greatest video gaming system for their children.  Consider what messages you are giving your children about the value of the holiday season.  Don't mistake spending money on someone as being the equivalent to showing your love.  The two having nothing to do with each other, yet are commonly confused.

If there is one important message to remember during this holiday season, it is don't forget to gift yourself.  The most important gift you can give to yourself is to live within your means.  If your finances don't allow you to purchase the gifts your heart desires to give, then give your heart instead.  It is much more valuable to a child than any toy in a box.  That toy will be forgotten about within a few days of the wrapping paper being ripped off.  The time and love and attention you show a child will live on forever inside of them, as it is the foundation for self-esteem, confidence, and self-worth.  Giving of yourself is the single best gift anyone can recieve. It is the most expensive when you consider its worth, and the cheapest when you consider its dollar value.

Create an image of yourself enjoying the holidays, stress-free, happy, and loved. Own it and hold steadfast to it. Don't give in as others around you will tempt you to falter. Once you have that image, ask yourself if the amount of money you spend on others this season has any bearing on your image?  Hopefully what you will see is that the holiday you wish to create has nothing to do with the amount of money you spend.  It has only to do with the emotions of being true to yourself, honoring your vision, and spending quality time with those you love.

Tammy Greene is a Licensed Mental Health Therapist with a successful private practice in Woburn.  She is currently accepting new clients.  You may reach her through her website at www.tgperspectives.com