Parent Education Book Talk: NY Times Columnist Jessica Lahey on "The Gift of Failure"

New York Times columnist and middle school teacher Jessica Lahey will speak about her best-selling book, The Gift of Failure: How the Best Parents Learn to Let Go So Their Children Can Succeed, on Wednesday, April 6 at 7:00 p.m. at Inly School in Scituate. The author will also be on hand to sign copies of her book, available for sale at the event from Buttonwood Books of Cohasset. Part of the Omran ♦ Nelson Speaker Series, this talk is open to the public. Tickets are $10 each and available for online purchase at www.inlyschool.org/Page/Community/Speaker-Series. Inly School is located at 46 Watch Hill Drive (off Route 123) in Scituate, MA. For more information, visit www.inlyschool.org or call 781-545-5544.

About Jessica Lahey

Along with her popular New York Times column “The Parent-Teacher Conference,” Jessica Lahey writes for The Atlantic and is a regular commentator on Vermont Public Radio. As a parenting and education expert, she has appeared on The Today Show, Fox and Friends, MSNBC, the BBC and NPR. Her book, The Gift of Failure: Why Parents Need to Learn to Let Go So Their Children Can Succeed, was published by HarperCollins in August 2015. Lahey, the mother of two boys, has taught middle and high school English for over a decade. For more information, visit www.jessicalahey.com.

About the Talk: “How to Step Back and Allow Your Child to Succeed”

The Gift of Failure focuses on the critical school years when parents must learn to allow their children to experience the disappointment and frustration that occur from life’s inevitable problems so that they can grow up to be successful, resilient and self-reliant adults. Modern parenting is defined by an unprecedented level of overprotectiveness, maintains Lahey. “Parents who rush to school at the whim of a phone call to deliver forgotten assignments, who challenge teachers on report card disappointments, mastermind children’s friendships, and interfere on the playing field” are commonplace, she says. Parents aren’t giving children the chance to experience failure—or the opportunity to learn to solve their own problems. Lahey lays out a blueprint with targeted advice for handling homework, report cards, social dynamics and sports. Most importantly, she sets forth a plan to help parents learn to step back and embrace their children’s failures. She reveals mistakes she made with her own children and students, and shows in practical terms how to know what your child is ready for and how to offer support even as you encourage autonomy.

The Montessori Connection

“We’re delighted that we were lucky enough to get Jessica Lahey to be part of our speaker series,” says Donna Milani Luther, Inly’s Head of School. “Her entire message is about allowing children to learn and grow through their successes as well as their mistakes,” says Luther, “—which meshes well with our philosophy as a Montessori school. If we as the grownups in their lives can step back and allow children to learn from their own experiences, and then apply what they’ve learned to the next experience, then their learning is going to be deeper and richer for it.” “A core Montessori principle is to ‘Never help a child with a task at which he feels he can succeed,’” explains Assistant Head of School, Julie Kelly-Detwiler. “In every interaction, as Montessori teachers, we thoughtfully move our students to independence. We carefully construct our classrooms, programming and curriculum in a way that encourages our students to try and fail and try again, always with the goal of allowing them to build a resilience, self-reliance and self-confidence they will carry with them throughout their lives.”

About Inly School

Inly is an independent Montessori school with innovative programs that inspire toddlers, preschool and K–8 students to become independent, lifelong learners. Its 10-acre campus includes the Outdoor Classroom for experiential learning and the Artsbarn for performing arts, assemblies and indoor sports. A new building, currently under construction, will house an Innovation Lab, Maker Space and Design Studio. For more information, visit www.inlyschool.org.