Recovery is Human Connection

It was during the “joys and concerns” part of the service, when parishioners share good and bad experiences and make prayer requests. When they were done, the pastor said he had something to say. That day he was celebrating eleven years of sobriety.

The applause that followed showed how this one community had come together to support those recovering from addiction. Instead of stigma, addiction to alcohol or opioids was recognized as the illness it is, and the road to health as one that needs their support.

For the pastor and countless others who have battled addiction—high school athletes, working moms, carpenters and executives—this support comes in various forms. It can be fellow members of a twelve-step program. It can be family and friends, who have learned how to love without enabling. It can be trained counsellors or therapists in a treatment facility. Or it can be a recovery coach.

When I heard that the Town of Stoneham had contracted with a recovery coach, I was curious. So I called up Tracy Ascolillo, who does recovery coaching in Stoneham and Wakefield and asked her what a recovery coach does.

“A recovery coach,” she said, “is someone with lived life experience who understands the struggle of addiction and supports others on the pathway to recovery. It might be a teenager or a senior citizen who is isolated and needs someone to talk to.”

She continued: “My own pathway is a twelve-step program,” she said. “But that doesn’t mean everyone wants to go that way. Some choose medication treatment. I help them, wherever they are, to get support that is sustainable.”

Employed by Eliot Community Services, Ascolillo gets many of her referrals from local police, often first responders to an overdose. “It could be a trip to the hospital, an arrest, a conflict involving alcohol or drugs—anyone on their radar. I’ll reach out to that person. And to the family.” She will also help with protocols and applications to treatment programs, and help link the person with essential services after discharge.

Ascolillo coaches clients from all walks of life. One of them is a teenager just out of high school. From a family afflicted by alcoholism, she’s now living in a sober home, into yoga, and planning for college. Another client is an older man who was a computer specialist. His alcoholism led to loss of job, family, and home. He spent five years on the streets, isolated from human connections.

From her experience, Ascolillo knows isolation can be deadly. “Addiction took me to a place where I was totally isolated. I had nothing. No one believed in me. No one trusted me.”

Ten years ago, she was living in a homeless shelter. Now with her partner, she owns her own home, where she lives with her three children. She cherishes her human connections. “People rely on me. They trust me, they love me.”

Bringing her experience and expertise to bear, Tracy Ascolillo is reaching out to anyone struggling with addiction, or needing support to stay in recovery. In doing so, she is building networks of recovery.

As we celebrate National Recovery Month this September, it’s a good time to celebrate all those supporting recovery in our town—family members, counselors, therapists, first responders, health care providers, educators, and, yes, recovery coaches.

Tonight, September 24, from 7 to 9 p.m., the Stoneham Coalition is holding a virtual vigil on Facebook, “Shine for Recovery.” Here’s how to take part:

Light a candle or luminary or put purple lights outside your home as a symbol of support for the recovery community in Stoneham. Then, on the Coalition Facebook page, share your lights, messages of hope or stories of recovery.

To learn more about the Coalition, visit www.stonehamcoalition.org or email Kayla Vodka, program director, at kvodka@stoneham-ma.gov

Note: Ben Jacques is a member of the Stoneham Coalition for a Safe and Healthy Community.