'My Home was Under Attack'

From a Friday, April 19 10:30 p.m. Facebook status update:

The nightmare of the last 24 hr was real. It did happen. There was no waking up from it, as I was already awake. I am proud to call Boston home and living in the burbs in Watertown is almost like living back home in South Burlington, VT. But I truly, for the first time in my life, feared for my life. My HOME was under attack. Some very dear friend's homes were under attack, right in the epi-center on Dexter Ave. My town was under siege. The places you saw on the news were the places I walk. The buildings you saw were buildings I used to work in. Most of today you were looking at the gym I work out in. The building I was locked down in, my home, my 'shelter-in place' was on yahoo.com behind a SWAT team vehicle. I shop in the mall where they setup the media and had the press conferences, I park in that parking lot.

I am typing on a new laptop I bought in that mall just about month ago. I took pictures of SWAT teams on my street, in front of my house, my safe haven. At one point I ventured out with my roommate, while under lock down, to see what all the people were talking pictures at two buildings away (sometime being stir crazy and having sleep deprivation messes with your head and your choices are not good). We didn't even get off our front steps. I turned to see an automatic weapon and a Swat team member right in front of me coming around the back on my house. MY HOUSE. There were three more behind him. Nicely, calmly, the first said he thinks it might be time for us to go back inside.

Then a second one with the concern in his voice like my father, asked if it was ok for us to go back in our house. We assured them it was and thanked them for everything they were doing. Since 1 am the three of us in my house all had a butcher knife with us. There were helicopters flying over so low it shook the house for close to 20 hours. For most of the day I had two to six cops standing in front of my house at all times. During the lock down I saw a couple in a mini-van stop in front of my house and had those same cops grab water out of the open back of the van. About three hours after we were greeted with automatic rifles on our front porch, the same roommate and I went out with a gallon of water and cups. More than once in the last 24 hrs I heard gun shots and explosives in my neighborhood. In the last 24 hrs I have had a total of 3 panic attacks, and countless tears. In the last 24 hrs I have had about an hour of sleep. But the body is funny, that hour felt like 4 and rejuvenated me. I know those same Swat team members, Watertown Police, State Police, FBI agents, and the countless other police officers PROTECTING MY TOWN did not have a wink of sleep. I had friend's running the marathon and was worried about them at the beginning of the week and never imagined them worrying about me by the end of the week. So in the end are the questions answered? No. Will they be? Who knows. But my take away message you is this: In the last 24 hrs my family in Vermont and so many of my facebook friends all over the world have been there for ME, you kept me going. You showed me your love and concern. My family in Vermont didn't sleep and I know friend's were with them in person and in prayer. From the bottom of my heart I thank you and I love you. But my mind still can't get over the fact that these two brothers were so young, the youngest was a teenager. I can't imagine what shit they have gone through for them to do these heinous acts to my HOME, my loved ones, my Watertown, my Boston. I and everyone who lives in Watertown and the surrounding communities are traumatized, as are our family, friends and loved one, and the healing will take a long time. But after all this I still hope the living brother receives prayers and the true care he needs. WATERTOWN STRONG BOSTON STRONG ♥