Imagine it better

Whenever you remember something, anything, from the past, imagine it better than it was.

Seriously, try it. I tried it around a problem that was really hard and scary and important, and it worked.

I was suffering in the present with a serious problem.

I thought at length about how I got into that situation, and I traced the story back to the distant past, where someone who had a lot of power over me taught me some really harmful lessons. I believed those lessons because I was a little child.

Those lessons followed me into adulthood, and led me to make a lot of self-defeating choices, thinking they were the right choices. I knew my choices sucked, but I didn’t believe that I had any other options.

I went into my imagination, and I re-enacted some old stories that I thought were key to my troubles. As I re-enacted them in my imagination, I changed the outcomes. I changed my actions, and I changed other people’s actions.

I intentionally imagined myself doing better things, like standing up for myself, and asking others to help me.

I imagined other people treating me differently, treating me better. I imagined central figures in my story acting respectfully toward me, instead of screaming at me, condemning me, telling me I was worthless and didn’t deserve help.

I imagined being able to share my problem with other people and actually getting help and guidance.

More next time…