'We're Just Looking Forward' Say Parents of Wayland Teen Runaway

Christina Loftis remembers 12 days of a ringing telephone — Picking up the receiver and, for the first few moments, holding her breath until she knew who was on the other end.

Tony Loftis remembers looking both ways — turning corners in New York City and looking in both directions down the street, hoping, pleading even, for a glimpse of his daughter.

Finally, 12 days after 13-year-old Alexandra “Allie” Loftis ran away from her Wayland home on Nov. 4, police located the eighth-grader, thanks to a tip, in a home in Jersey City, N.J.

“When I saw her, we didn’t say much, I just hugged her and told her I loved her,” Christina Loftis said of her first moments with her daughter after 12 days of a frantic, yet calculated, search focused on New York City.

Sitting on a sofa in their living room, Tony and Christina Loftis are quiet but matter-of-fact about what has transpired for their family during the month of November. In the aftermath, according to Tony Loftis, they are working hard to move forward and discover their new “normal.”

For now, normal doesn’t mean having their daughter at home, though evidence of Allie’s presence is everywhere in the Loftis’ North Wayland home. From the many family photos lining shelves to the countless pieces of artwork – a large painting of a flower, a papier-mâché animal head, a cloth collage depicting a smiling girl on a dramatic background – images of Allie’s life are apparent.

The Loftises don’t know when Allie, herself, will be back in town. Tony Loftis said the road back for his daughter is long, more of a marathon than a sprint, but Allie is safe and getting the help she needs to heal.

Christina Loftis said prior to finding their daughter, she and her husband were putting things in place to help Allie once they found her. They refused to consider the possibility that she might be gone for good.

Searching for Allie

The night of Friday, Nov. 4, Tony Loftis stepped off a plane in Myrtle Beach, S.C., and received a call from his wife. Christina Loftis told him she came home from work that night to find their daughter gone.

“That whole night, I had several visits from Wayland Police,” Christina Loftis said. “We called some of her friends with the police just trying to see if there was any [information] … I honestly didn’t think she was in Wayland.

“Our immediate thought was she was on a bus to New York.”

Their instinct proved accurate. Allie caught a Peter Pan bus in Boston; surveillance footage at the Port Authority in Manhattan showed her exiting that bus.

That was the last sighting of Allie for nearly two weeks.

Within a couple days of Allie's disappearance, her parents had launched a social networking and media campaign that eventually led to their daughter’s safe return.

And it all started with coaching soccer.

Tony Loftis serves on the board of the Wayland Soccer Association and just this year agreed to coach a team in order to fill a vacant position.

“The only reason I coached soccer this season is because they were down a coach,” Tony Loftis said, adding that he knew he didn’t have much spare time to devote to the effort. “It turned out to be, in terms of finding my daughter, the best decision I’ve ever made in my life.”

Tony Loftis said one of the other coaches mentioned a previous missing persons search he knew of during which people set up a Facebook page for the missing person.

“We did that pretty quickly,” Tony Loftis said. “It’s a template that anybody can use. We were able to create it on the spot because of all the social media options that are available to us now.”

Maintaining the “Find Allie Loftis” Facebook page became one of Christina Loftis’s primary tasks each day.

“I had to-do lists every day,” Christina Loftis said. “Keeping the Facebook page updated and keeping everyone informed. I tried to keep people here so that I wasn’t alone. I was busy.”

Allie’s mother also settled on the task of caring for Puffy, the small dog Allie received as a gift several years ago. “I tried to take walks and still care for the dog,” Christina Loftis said. “Do the basics. Get up every day with a plan.”

Tony Loftis headed to New York City the Monday after Allie disappeared. There, he said he would spend 16 or 17 hours a day searching for his daughter. For him, that involved meetings, phone calls, media appearances and more. There was plenty, he said, that people recommended they try, but there just weren’t enough hours in the day.

“We have a great network of friends who did a lot of the stuff we asked them to,” Tony Loftis said, mentioning specifically the families from Belmont Day School where Allie attended from pre-K through fourth grade. “People would say, ‘Have you thought of this.’ I’d say ‘No, I haven’t had time,’ and they would just do it. They were tremendous.”

Found

Police found Allie, thanks to a tip, in a New Jersey home with a man she apparently met online. All the media efforts the Loftis’ pursued ultimately led to the tip that took police to Allie.

“The New York City Police called and said, ‘We have her. She’s in New Jersey,” Tony Loftis said.

Not long after getting that phone call from police, Tony Loftis got a phone call from the man who tipped off authorities.

“He told me he was calling from a neighborhood where people don’t call police,” Tony Lofits said of that conversation with the tipster. The person who called in the tip had seen Allie around the neighborhood and then saw her father pleading for her return on television news. “He said, ‘I have a young kid and I would hope that someone would do the same for me.’”

Looking back on the experience, Tony and Christina Loftis said they know they took steps to ensure their daughter’s safety online, but they urged other parents to never say, “My kid would never …”

“We said the same thing,” Tony Loftis said. “She’s a good kid, but not perfect. But I think anybody would say that. We live in Wayland. It’s a great place because there are a lot of helicopter parents. You’re not the oddball when you’re that into your kids’ lives.”

The Loftises said they were involved and aware of Allie’s online activity. Christina Loftis said she regularly checked her daughter’s cell phone and computer history. In addition, Allie typically used the computer in a public part of the house.

At one time, Tony Lofits had installed parental control, spyware-style software on his daughter’s computer. He said he monitored it for about a week, didn’t see anything of concern and stopped.

“In retrospect, I would strongly advise parents to [use parental control software],” he said.

“Most of the parents with young kids now, grew up pre-Internet,” Tony Loftis said. “It was a time you just had to worry about who your kids met face-to-face. What happens on the Internet, you can’t control.

“If we could take something back, we wouldn’t have let her get on Facebook.”

But Tony and Christina Loftis are not focused on the past.

“We’re just looking forward,” Christina Loftis said. “We need to work on a solution. We need to help her get better and look at the positive end. I try not to think of the ‘what-ifs.’ We’re good parents.”

They said they are grateful for the support, assistance and prayers of their friends and family.

“We moved out here because we thought it was a great community to raise kids in,” Tony Loftis said. “And there has been nothing about this that has changed our minds. If anything, more so … how people have rallied around us to help find our daughter and afterwards to give us the space to heal.”