Does Everybody Really Win?

If winning is treated as the ultimate goal, then why are we giving it away? With the idea that “Everybody Wins” we are not only giving our children a false sense of security, but we’re also damaging their coping skills. When children are young it shouldn’t be about winning, it should be about learning skills. Everybody doesn’t win, so the sooner we step away from that philosophy and move towards cultivating their talents and teaching our children how to pick themselves up on the days they lose the more confident and capable society we’ll have.  There are teachable moments in losing such as how you can improve for the next time.  As parents we need to encourage our children, but if my child is the one on the soccer field pulling weeds instead of playing the game then she’s not a supportive member of that team, and if she thinks she “won” she will have learned that she doesn’t have to try in order to succeed.  The longer we continue the mantra of “Everybody Wins” the more difficult we’re making other coaches, teachers and employers jobs.