Rep. Day Editorial: 'Start a Dialogue: Raise Awareness about Sexual Assault

WINCHESTER, MA—State Representative Michael S. Day, who represents Stoneham and Winchester, discusses sexual assault in light of April being Sexual Assault Awareness Month in his latest editorial.

His editorial can be found below:

April is sexual assault awareness month in the United States. It is a time when we seek to raise public awareness about the frequency of sexual violence.

Sexual violence is not a new phenomenon. Since the beginning of time, it has been used as a means to exert power and control – to dehumanize, humiliate and subjugate.

Sexual violence is not an easy subject to discuss. It is, in any form, the most personal and the most violative of any crime someone could commit. Sexual assault, rape and domestic violence are all heavy terms. They make people uneasy. These crimes, though, are too prevalent to ignore.

A recent statistic shows that someone is sexually assaulted in the United States every 107 seconds. Stated in a different way, a study concludes that, conservatively, approximately one in six women are sexually assaulted in their lifetimes. I say conservatively because other studies put that number closer to one in three, as this is a crime that too often goes unreported because of a number of factors including shame.

There is a persistent myth in our society that sexual violence is committed by strangers assaulting drunk, scantily clad, adult women who put themselves in dangerous situations. This is false. Eighty two percent of sexual assaults are perpetrated by someone the victim knows; 44 percent of victims are under eighteen years old; and an incomprehensible fifteen percent of victims of sexual assault are under the age of twelve.

Also contrary to popular belief is the fact that women are not the only victims of sexual violence crimes. One out of every thirty-three men in America is sexually assaulted in his lifetime. Although this number may be eye-opening to you, it is generally accepted to also be a very conservative number because these crimes are also far more likely to go unreported. Some studies put the number of men who are actually sexually assaulted in their lifetimes at one in ten.

What is not disputed is that the majority of perpetrators of sexual violence are men, whether that crime is male on female or male on male. That is why it is so important to recognize this month as Sexual Assault Awareness Month. We must educate ourselves and our next generation of our young men about the importance of respect, consent and what truly constitutes a healthy relationship.

Education and clear, honest discussions are important on any topic impacting our lives. On the topic of sexual violence, education and unambiguous, honest conversations are essential. My wife and I are raising three sons. Our oldest just turned ten, and we haven’t discussed the birds and the bees with him yet. We have, however, taught him and his eight-year old brother about the importance of treating others equally and with dignity. We have also repeatedly spoken with them about the value of according respect to others – male or female – about demanding respect in return, and about standing up to individuals who do not show respect to them or to others.

Finally, a word about words. Instead of calling individuals who have suffered sexual assault or domestic violence “victims,” it is more appropriate to call them what they are: survivors. They will carry memories of the attacks with them for the rest of their lives, but they have the courage to speak out about these crimes and to take a stand against their attackers. I have dedicated much of my adult life, first as a lawyer and now as a State Representative, to working with these survivors and helping them move on with their lives. I feel privileged to do this work, because these men and women exhibit strength that inspires me daily.

Please take a moment this month to educate yourself and others about sexual assault. You can find more information and resources online at www.janedoe.org, the Massachusetts Coalition Against Sexual Assault and Domestic Violence.