Moms Talk: Do You Have A "Sick Day" Parent?

It was practically inevitable.  Just two weeks ago, my husband and I remarked how healthy Sebastian had been since he had entered daycare four months ago, comparing him to our daughter, who probably spent more time home than at the center for her first few months out of the house.

Now, Bass is home ill.

It doesn't seem major -- a little fever, a minor crankiness, some coughing and sneezing, all likely caused by the teeth that still haven't come in despite being over eight months old.  But a fever is a fever, and so home he stays.

There's a struggle every time my husband and I have to deal with a sick child.  As a freelancer, I don't have the ability to take paid leave.  Whatever work I can't do because I'm watching a child is work I have to do some other time. 

My husband, on the other hand, has plenty of paid sick time.  In fact, he has so much of it that he's actually losing days he isn't using.  It seems logical that he should be the one to care for a sick child.

But then you have to throw another child into the equation.  Having a daycare located by my husband's office is very convenient for work, but not so much on a day off.  So if he stays home, that means both kids are home, not just one.  And one sick kid on his or her own is much easier to deal with that one sick kid and one well child needing entertainment.  With two kids at home, both of us still need to be engaged -- one comforting the sick and one entertaining the not sick.

So, I care for the baby, holding him until he's tired, rocking him when he cries, and, if there is a moment of distraction when he can play by himself or actually fall asleep somewhere other than in my arms, I do my own work.  Otherwise, I will work once everyone is home and in bed, or catch up on another day.

Meanwhile, my husband watches another sick day disappear because he has too many unused days on his calendar.

I could complain more, but the baby is crying again.