A Mulititude of Voices

When I was growing up there were a number of influential voices in my life:  My parents, my grandparents, my aunts and uncles, a few neighbors, Happy Days, the Love Boat, you get the idea.  If I had to, I could probably count the voices of influence on a few hands.  And yet, for the most part, they were all coming from the same value base (with possibly the exception of the Love Boat).  There wasn’t a whole lot of conflicting information in the voices influencing my life. 

Things have changed.  Today there is a barrage of voices.  From media to the internet, advertising to music, video games to pop culture.  An overwhelming number of opinions and values are trying to influence us on many levels.   As adults we are able to sift through the information, balance it with our own value system, wants, and needs, take what is relevant and toss out the rest.  For adolescents, however, this process is much more complicated.  Adolescents are in their most formative stage and they are desperate to understand the mysteries of life.  It is normal and expected behavior for kids to be looking for answers to things that still elude them.  Life’s mysteries about relationships, spirituality, sexuality, chemical use, etc. are at the forefront of the minds of teenagers.   As they look for information to solve life’s mysteries, the voices can be misguiding and troubling. 

More than ever it is critical that we as caregivers are the loudest and most prevalent voice our kids hear.  Put your value system out there frequently and be louder about what you believe in.  Look for every opportunity to communicate your values.  Watch for opportunities in news stories, in life events, and advertising, to communicate clearly what you believe to them.  Lead them into the scripture through family devotion and prayer.  Surround them, as often as possible, with people who live and communicate the values that you believe in.  Whenever possible let them see and hear what you think is important. 

In addition to that, minimize the amount of voices in the lives of your kids.  You can do this by limiting total amount of screen time; which is video games, television, texting and internet time (all devises, computer, phones, IPods, etc).  The U.S.D.A. recommendation is 45 minutes per day.  I also recommend that you minimize the amount of unsupervised time your kids have and make sacred family time where the rest of the voices are silenced.  Don’t allow interruptions from phone calls, text messages or checking of these things as you connect over family activity time, faith building time, walks in the woods, car rides, and meals.

In this culture of many voices, we need to be aware and proactive in order for our values to come out on top.  State clearly and as often as possible, the values that are important to you, your faith and your value system. 

What are some creative ways you are learning to communicate your values to your kids?