On Surveys and Overreacting

On Surveys and Open Discussion

First off, I know I am a bit behind on this. That being said, I still wanted to address it since I feel I am the odd person out with my opinion.

Recently parents of 7th and 8th graders that attend Lurgio Middle School in Bedford, NH were up in arms regarding a survey that was given to the kids. A letter was sent home to the parents stating, “The survey is called Search Institute Profiles of Student Life: Attitudes and Behaviors, and the purpose of the survey is to gather information about students’ attitudes, perceptions, decision making and behaviors.” The letter also stated that the survey has been given out anonymously and voluntarily every 3-4 years for the past 15 years.

The survey itself included questions regarding; Gender, sexual orientation, sexual experience, drugs/alcohol, self-harm, suicide, family/home life, depression, and more. Total, the survey had 160 questions. Several parents found the survey to be “provocative” and “inappropriate.” They also felt they were lead on because the letter sent to them did not disclose the types of questions nor were they allowed to see the survey.

I completely disagree with the parents, and I want to address why.

• The letter home clearly states the survey is voluntary. If a parent did not want their child taking the survey they could have easily opted them out of it.

• The letter home clearly states the survey is anonymous. So, even though the questions are asking about a student's private life, they will not know which student replied which way (“no individual student's data will be reported.”) Also, the surveys are not reviewed by school staff, but rather the Search Institute.

Let's say the parents were allowed to see the survey. That might skew the way a kid responded to certain questions. For example, say a student is homosexual, but not “out of the closet.” If he or she has parents who are homophobic and they see the survey, it could either lead the student to lie on the survey, or possibly even force them to come out to his or her parents when they are not ready. However, parents not seeing the survey may have been beneficial. The items on the survey are topics we need to be talking to young people about, but a lot of times don't. There are people who feel they're too young, there's no point (“well my kid doesn't have sex, so why do we need to talk about it?”) , or that shielding them from the “tough” topics will somehow make them immune. This survey could possibly get students thinking, and inspire them to bring up the tough stuff on their own (“Hey Mom, a question on the survey I took today asked me about alcohol. I was wondering if I could ask some questions?)

Calling the survey “provocative” makes it seem like there is something dirty or shameful about discussing sex, drugs, gender, sexual orientation, and so on. It shouldn't be. We should be having open discussion and dialogue with our kids about this stuff. I believe that by talking openly about the categories on the survey our kids would be less likely to get into drugs, be confused about who they are, have sex too young (fun fact: It has been factually and statistically proven that abstinence only education is ineffective and even harmful), or it could even help them realize they can talk to someone if they are feeling depressed.

But, I may be getting ahead here. The whole point is that the survey was anonymous and voluntary.

I feel as though parents made much too big of a deal out of it.