Remembering Mrs. Luti

Thirty Six years ago today, March 19, 1979 I had my first track practice at Concord High. We ran Brady Loop and I remember walking several times. At the end of practice that day, in the team room I told Coach Luti that I was going to be a star. He face crinkled into that classic smile. I think he thought I was nuts. I had no idea on that day that I would, in fact be a star (in running circles anyway) nor did I know just how profoundly not just Coach, but his wife Mrs. Luti would affect my life.

Mrs Luti passed away on Sunday. She was 90 years old. No doubt a long and well lived life but still, far too soon for those who knew her. I can’t speak of her without crying and my mind is full of memories that come rushing out of nowhere. I am feeling sad and nostalgic. Thirty six years has passed very quickly.

When I was running for Coach he and Mrs. Luti were in their fifties. I am in my fifties. This astounds me. As a teenaged girl they seemed so old. Mr. Luti retired shortly after I graduated at the ripe old age of 62. What a smart man! They have traveled the world, seen their children and grandchildren grow up and enjoyed quiet time together at home. The modest house in which they live is the only one they have owned since coming to Concord in 1957. I love this fact. They bought their house to be a home. Every room has memories and stories.

I have stayed in touch with Coach since graduating high school. I always stopped in when I was home visiting from college. When I returned to Concord in 1989 I would stop in periodically to catch up. When I started coaching I would ask for advice or invite him to come do a clinic for me. I shared my victories and my defeats with him. As deeply as these visits have etched themselves into my mind, they all began the same way…with Mrs. Luti.

I would knock on the door, tentatively if I was dropping by unannounced, and wait. If they were both home, Mrs. Luti would answer. The door would open, she would appear around it and sigh. She sighed with her whole body. I didn’t take offense to these sighs, at least not in later years after I had become a coach myself. They weren’t personal. I was one of hundreds of Coach Luti’s athletes. We ALL came by to say hi. With great resignation she would say “Oh Barbara, it’s you” and then lead me into the living room, or study, or workshop, or garden where ever Coach might be and announce my arrival. Although my visits were not frequent this is what I will miss the most.

There were times that she sat me down with HER and asked me questions. She loved to talk and loved knowing what was going on. She would perch on the arm of a chair and begin. “Now Barbara” she would say and then carry on. I loved talking with Mrs. Luti. She had an opinion about everything and was not afraid to share it. More than once her questions concerned me and her opinions were not always complimentary. I knew where she stood. I would explain my side and she would respectfully listen. Very often she was right and more than once in my life I have pondered what her thoughts might be before I made a decision. Regardless of how she felt about things, she loved me.

When my visits were with Coach she would bring me a snack. Never too big but always delicious. Cheese and crackers, fresh veggies from the garden, jam made by her daughter Angela. I loved these snacks. Coach and I would talk and as the years went on our talks became much more about life and less about running. My visits began to be with the both of them. While Coach and I liked to reminisce, Mrs. Luti was much more into the here and now. She moved quickly and was always buzzing around the house. She didn’t sit still much and seldom sat for the whole visit. In recent years she sighed less and less upon seeing me at the door. My involvement in the Bill Luti Road Race meant a lot to her. She made this clear again and again.

When I lost my job in the school district she was one of the first people to call me and see how I was. She told me to come over as soon as I could. She was so supportive and kind (well, to ME anyway). She had her opinions about that as well. She thought my run for the school board was brilliant. She became one of my biggest fans. She will never know how important that was to me.

When I brought my cross-country teams to the house trick-or-treating she would have cider for all of us. We would cram into the living room and talk with Coach. My runners loved this. One day I stopped by to take him to lunch. Mrs. Luti was not home and since I had not confirmed these plans with Coach he left her a note. At the restaurant he carefully divided the meal and brought half of it home. Upon our return she greeted us with “I hope you brought me left-overs!”

The last time I saw her was this past fall at a polling place. We chatted on about this and that and she told me to please drop by to visit. When it came time to leave she took my hands in hers and said “You have always been your own person Barbara, good or bad you are who you are, no apologies”. “I love that about you” “Don’t you ever change”.

As I conclude this memory a waterfall of fresh tears find their way down my face. I won’t change Mrs. Luti, but I sure will miss your face appearing around the door.