On this Father’s Day, a Family Remembers a Decades-Old Gift of Life

To this day, Lanay cannot get the words out without crying when talking about how her father, who has been her personal basketball coach, her movie-loving buddy who she has watched countless of movies with, and the forever daddy beyond her being a little girl - literally sacrificed a piece of himself, so she could live.

"My dad and I have always been very close, and I have so much respect for him,” Lanay says. “And even though it has been so long....” She had to pause because she could not get the rest of the sentence out. It's been almost 10 years to the date since it happened.

"Excuse me, it still makes me cry,” Lanay continues. “When I found out that day in the doctor’s office that he wanted to give me his kidney, I was overwhelmed.”

“What an honor to have my father do this for me," she continued. “I told him I would be indebted to him for the rest of my life, and he said, ‘ Do not think that way. You are my daughter, I am your father. I should be doing this for you and I want to do this for you.’ “

Lanay’s mom, Sabrina, remembers that Rene was the first person who underwent tests to see if he could serve as a kidney donor. “They always say that the youngest and the strongest go first, so he was going to go first,” Sabrina said. Once Dad was identified as a match, he went through almost two months of testing to make sure they could move forward with the transplant. “(Everyone) was surprised because you usually match with your sibling and not your parent,” Sabrina said. On that fateful day, she ran between their rooms to see how they were following the surgery.

“He was a perfect match, so there was no need to test anyone else,” Lanay adds about the dad who used to give her pointers on doing all things basketball from the time she played in recreational leagues as a 9-year-old child to playing junior varsity and varsity at Secaucus High School.

“It was a no-brainer. I raised my hand immediately.” said Rene. “When the result came back that I was a perfect match, we jumped quick.”

“It was about doing what needed to be done to keep her alive,” said Mom.

The journey to that kidney transplant 10 years ago began in the summer of 2016. Lanay, a vibrant 15-year-old basketball player at Secaucus High School, was looking forward to her junior year. She fell ill, and during a confusing and frightening period of tests and doctor visits, the Lopez family found their way to Dr. Kenneth Lieberman at Joseph M. Sanzari Children’s Hospital at Hackensack University Medical Center, where Lanay received a life-altering diagnosis - acute kidney failure following a series of kidney function tests. The path forward was stark - long-term dialysis or a kidney transplant.

Kidneys remain the most in-demand organ for transplants in the United States and New Jersey. The need for living donors is immense. More than 100,000 people in the United States are currently on the organ transplant waiting list, with close to 90,000 of them in need of a kidney. The average wait time for a deceased donor kidney can be three to five years.

Mom and Dad were her anchors, Lanay said, and Dr. Lieberman was the doctor who acted like her second father before, during and after she had the kidney transplant at the age of 16. "He was so attentive and caring, and he explained things really well. I remember feeling like he was a father figure. He was always there for you, and you could ask him personal questions, really about anything and everything."

Dr. Lieberman, a sought-after international speaker on kidney health, remembers the honor of being a partner in the family’s story of sacrifice and hope.

"As a nephrologist, we are trained in the science of kidney function, but the core of our work is profoundly human,” said Dr. Lieberman. ”To witness the journey of a patient like Lanay, and to see the depth of a father's love, as Rene so selflessly demonstrated, is the ultimate reminder of why this work is a privilege. It is an incredible honor to be entrusted with the care of patients who are the recipients of such a precious gift.”

Lanay is thriving today, and this week had the joy of meeting with Dr. Liebrerman to catch up. She transitioned to the adult care of a nephrologist a few years, so had not seen Dr. Lieberman in five years. The two hugged and once again she found herself having to catch her breath from fighting back tears as she thanked Dr. Lieberman for caring for her those years ago.

“You are really thriving and doing so much good for the community,” Dr. Lieberman said during the reunion referencing the fact that Lanay is now working as an analyst with the New Jersey Youth Justice Commission, formerly known as Juvenile Justice Commission, after studying criminal justice and psychology in college.

In addition to her meeting with Dr. Lieberman, Lanay is also planning a 10-year-post-transplant celebration of some kind with her family, and of course, her dad will be the star of the event. For now, they will enjoy their usual routines.

"For the love of sports, he watches everything," she says, adding that the family was rooting for the New York Knicks historic win. "And I'll always sit there with him and enjoy."