A Love Letter to my Community

The moment I got off the path train in 2006 and walked along the beautiful Hoboken waterfront, I fell in love. I knew instantly that this community was my forever home. Over the past two years, our community, like many other communities, has endured a lot of pain and suffering, but living through this pandemic with my fellow Hobokonites has made my love for Hoboken grow stronger and deeper. Hearing the buzz of remote learning (as well as Ms. Babilonia’s dog barking) in the background strengthened my love and admiration for the Hoboken School District. Hearing the silence when my daughter went back to school wasn’t too bad either.

When my own father died from COVID, the outpouring of love and support from this community overwhelmed me and brought me to tears. Years from now when this pandemic is hopefully long behind us, I imagine I will tell my grandchildren stories about how this community helped me through the darkest time of my life.

That is why watching my beloved community at times be cruel to one another over the Hoboken High School proposal has been especially painful. A Hoboken mom recently asked on social media: “Where has my community gone?” I have stayed mostly quiet during these heated High School conversations, even though I have been in the educational field for twenty-five years, have written five books on literacy, and have worked with countless school districts across the world on literacy improvement (including students in Hoboken).

My silence was not because I didn’t have anything to say, but rather what I had to say didn’t seem to have a place in the ongoing dialogue. All around me were yes conversations and no conversations. The problem for me was: I wasn’t a yes, but I wasn’t a no. I was somewhere in the middle, that tricky gray area. I’m sure a lot of people are just like me–thinking it over, not wanting to get into heated conversations, but wanting to do what is best for the teachers and children in Hoboken.In my professional field, we often speak about the dangers of binary thinking.

Binary thinking is the idea that there is one right or wrong answer. It’s so easy to fall into this type of thinking. Believe me, I’ve been guilty of this many times.

Binary thinking is safe. It creates a world where things are black and white. But the problem is most things in this world are not black and white. Usually, there are shades of gray. It takes bravery to lean into this uncertainty, but I believe that the gray area is where the magic happens–it’s the sweet spot.

In this gray area, we are apt to listen, and to speak carefully, respond with honesty and perhaps even revise our thinking, just a bit. I’ve thought about both binary thinking and shades of gray as I have tried to make sense of the Hoboken High School proposal. I keep asking myself: What is best for the community and the children in it that I love so deeply?

Bear with me as I share my thoughts about the High School proposal. They are not black or white, but rather many shades of gray.

The vote will happen on January 25th, no matter how we feel on this matter. One side will win and the other side will lose. Either way, the community needs to come back to the table and do what is best for children because that’s what you do when you love someone or something. You show up and move forward, letting your love drive the process.

The community absolutely should have been more involved in the beginning stages of this proposal. Yes, let the experts create the proposal and the building design, but bring the community into the conversation, so they have time to get educated, get excited and make it better. Yes, it’s difficult to have conversations when people don’t agree, but that’s exactly why it should happen. No proposal would have pleased everyone, but everyone’s voices in the Hoboken community deserve to be considered and understood. How something is done is just as important as what is done. A faulty process cannot and should not be taken lightly.

On the other hand, there is a danger of saying no because of a faulty process. Who potentially loses out? It’s the children.The impact of a beautiful facility can’t be underestimated, nor can it be measured by test scores. So for some, saying yes takes a leap of faith. But for a moment just imagine every high school student in this district spending their days in a building that is beautiful and opens up so many avenues of new learning and recreation. How might this change their perception of school? How might this change their perception of life? Every student and teacher in this district deserves a beautiful and expansive High School and they deserved it yesterday!

But good facilities are not enough. This moment of time gives us an incredible opportunity to provide our children and teachers with an amazing High School, while at the same time ensuring that the education students get prepares them for college and/or a successful life. There are students graduating now reading at a basic level, far, far behind where they need to be in order to succeed. I don't say this to bash teachers or students. I say this because I love teachers and students.

Let me be very clear here: There are amazing things happening in the Hoboken School District. My own daughter is thriving there and will continue to thrive in middle and high school regardless of what happens. But her experience is not every child’s experience. In order for our community to thrive, we need to not only watch over our own children, but also watch over other people's children.

The truth is: Some children struggle learning to read, while others learn quite easily. This is true for all students both in Hoboken and outside of Hoboken. Becoming a good reader shouldn’t have anything to do with whether you are rich or poor or black or white, but the problem is that it often does. To give an example: If a child is struggling to read and the family has surplus money, they often hire a tutor who specializes in reading difficulties. This additional support and practice often solves the problem, or the family finds a school that better suits their child’s needs. A family who doesn’t have the privilege to hire a tutor or switch schools doesn't and that child is more likely to continue struggling.

Yes, it takes a village to ensure that every child regardless of race or background becomes a powerful and critical reader, but a school district plays a pivotal role in this mission. When a district is brave enough to honestly examine the issue, train their staff and support staff in the ‘sciences of reading’ and then provide the staff with a strong language arts curriculum, schools can become the great equalizer.

Addressing this problem of literacy inequality at the district level is JUST as urgent as an expansive facility. Just as our children needed a better facility yesterday, they also needed a literacy focus yesterday. I’m struggling to figure out how to vote yes without it. I’m sure the district that I love so dearly has things already in place to address inequalities in literacy. It would be helpful to share these and let us know their next steps in improving upon them.

So with the vote around the corner, where do we go from here? First, everyone should vote so that each and every voice is heard. If my community says yes, I hope we can immediately come together for the urgent conversation of ensuring that every child has an equal opportunity at becoming a powerful and critical reader. If my community says no, I hope we come together with a new proposal and a plan of action for addressing the inequities in literacy.

Yes, making a commitment whether your side wins or loses takes bravery, but it also takes love. I believe my beloved community can do this.

About Leah:
Leah Mermelstein is a well-known expert and author on the teaching of writing, reading, and language development. She works closely with school districts, teachers, and students, helping develop and deliver quality and cohesive literacy instruction. She holds a Master’s Degree in Cultural Diversity and Curriculum Reform and aspires to ground all of her work in creating equitable access to children and families. She also holds a New Jersey supervisory certificate. She lives in Hoboken, New Jersey with her nine year old daughter who attends Brandt Elementary School. She has published five books on the teaching of writing, reading and the connection between the two.